Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

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Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby pd Rydia » Thu Mar 31, 2005 4:06 pm

You know, I run into so much of this I might as well confine it all to a thread. Or attempt to.

ANYWHO!

Today's Random Web HI-Larity! is courtesy of the livejournal community Customers_Suck!


<hr width="74%" align=left size=8 noshade>
<ul>([info]chokatobuttrfly) wrote in [info]customers_suck,
@ 2005-03-29 18:03:00


Okay.. I knew some people were stupid down here, but this lady amazes me.

Me: dancing DDR monkey!! yay!!
P1: stupid idiot lady with her toddler
P2: stupid idiot lady's toddler

Okay, everyday except for Friday and Saturday we have a PM, which means we basically clean a machine inside and out. I was busy doing my PM and had to leave my rag soaked in Orange Clean type stuff to go pay attention to a howler monkey.. I mean, a customer. So I come back and my rag is gone. And thus our story begins....

Me: *runs around trying to find the rag, spies P2 running around with it, CHEWING on it and sucking the orange clean out of the rag* OMFG!!! *runs over to P2 and tries to grab the rag* You shouldn't eat that!
P2: *unholy wail of the undead*
P1: *runs over and slaps my hand away* Don't take that from him!
Me: Ma'am, that rag is soaked in cleaner. He shouldn't be eating that, and I will need it back please.
P1: *grabs P2 and keeps him away from my reach so I cannot grab the rag*
P2: *keeps chewing on the rag, now drooling happily, and the drool is mostly foamy*
Me: *alarmed and reaches again* MA'AM! I really should get that rag from him.
P1: No, it's okay. It looks clean, and it smelled like oranges so I gave it to him.
Me: O.o;;; YES, it's ORANGE CLEAN. it's a CLEANSER, which he should not be eating. Plus I need to clean the machine.
P1: But we're customers! Why can't you just let him have this rag?
Me: Because it's SOAKED in cleanser??!!!!
P1: But it SMELLS like oranges *rolls her eyes* He'll be fine.
Me: Ma'am if you do not give me that rag, I will call security. I also suggest you take him to the first aid if you will not call a doctor immediately.
P1: *grabs the rag from P2* OH FINE!
P2: *more unholy cries of the DAMNED*
P1: You didnt have to be such a bitch about it! *throws rag in my face*
Me: Ma'am, you really should get him medical help just in case.... at least get him some water!
P1: *to P2* Come on baby, we'll go to Wal-Mart and get some oranges, and then we'll bring them back here and you can eat them so this lady can see that ORANGES ARE NOT POISONOUS!!!
Me: ::sweatdrop, dramatic death, OMFG... cries::</ul>

WAIT! But that's not ALL!

<ul>([info]chokatobuttrfly) wrote in [info]customers_suck,
@ 2005-03-30 22:13:00


Me: your lovely dancing arcade monkey!!
SL: stupid lady who happens to be the sister of Orange Clean Lady, oh dear god the horror!

Me: *talking to Sbarro's guy trying to get her food since it is LUNCH BREAK TIME!! yay!! though is working alone so must grab food and haul ass back to arcade*
SL: Excuse me, are you the girl who was working at the arcade yesterday?
Me: *against my better judgement and the voices in my head screaming "IT'S A TRAP! OMFGZ RUN!!!!"* Yes. Can I help you?
SL: Well, my sister and her son were there yesterday.... *pauses, looks around*
Me: *eyes widen* oh-fucking-god-no...
SL: Well, why were you a bitch!? Why couldn't you just have given him the rag?!
Me: It was filled with cleaner. That is dangerous for a child to be eating. omfg why do people not get simple concepts like poisoning???
SL: But Orange Cleaner doesnt hurt anyone. I've drank some before and I'm fine.
Me: W-T-F?! Lady, I hardly think you'd be here today if you drank it. Now I'm on my lunch break and I have to go. *tries to move away, but is blocked*
SL: OKAY.. so I just had a little on my finger by accident, but I tasted it and it was okay and I didn't get sick!
Me: pleasegodienowokaythnx It's still stupid to eat it. Now I have to go.
SL: FINE.. but if you dont want to get fired, this is what I want you to do... go back to your arcade, get a CLEAN rag so you DONT have to worry about my nephew, and give it to me so I can give it to him.
Me: *exasperated sigh, visions of horrible deaths for this lady going through my head* No Ma'am, I will not. It's technically Namco's property and maybe you should get him a security blanket or something.
SL: FINE, then I'm going to report you to the police.
Me: FOR NOT GIVING YOU A RAG?!!!
SL: No, because I bet something BAD was on that rag.
Me: please some deity shoot me down now, or better yet, HER!~ Lady, I was using it to CLEAN THE MACHINE. What BAD could be on it?
SL: Something you were huffing because my nephew is SICK now!
Me: I'm not surprised since he inhaled orange clean. You know what, why don't you go find an aspirin smelling candle and give it to him.
Meanwhile not in my knowledge, someone working in food court sees this and calls security for me
SL: Oh look, here's security now! I'm going to report you!
Security: Crys, is she bothering you?
Me: Yes she is. She must be hopped up on chocolate smelling lotion frmo Bath and Body Works.
Security: *gives a questionable look*
Me: You know Orange Clean lady I told Steve about? That's her sister.
Security: *Takes the lady away without another word*
Me: *VICTORY~~~~@@@@@!!!!!!!*</ul> <p>
<div style="text-align:center">"Pants are bad!!! We should wear pants only on our head you conformist bastard!!! Pants are the devils work!! Run freee!! And pantless!!!" -- Vulture</div>
</p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Vampire Jester Jinx » Thu Mar 31, 2005 5:24 pm

.....Special Yeah. ..........The world is full of dumbfucks. Dumbfucks and the occassional security guard to haul them away.

.......That kid (if it grows up) will likely go into seizures at the scent of Oranges. <p><div style="text-align:center">

I rule the fanart forum with a fist of irony. .....I have nothing else witty to say. Or quote. I'm a sad person.</div></p>Edited by: [url=http://p068.ezboard.com/brpgww60462.showUserPublicProfile?gid=vampirejesterjinx>Vampire] at: 3/31/05 17:25

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby NebulaQueen » Thu Mar 31, 2005 5:51 pm

...wow. Those ladies sure are "special". <p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby BrainWalker » Thu Mar 31, 2005 9:37 pm

The ending was the best part. It made the whole goddamned thing entirely worthwhile. <p><div style="text-align:center">Image</div></p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Justice Augustus » Thu Mar 31, 2005 10:14 pm

Orange cleanser is good to eat because it smells like orange...

...

I despair.
<p>

"Moreover, when on the following night, much to his dismay, [Caesar] had a dream of raping his own mother, the soothsayers greatly encouraged him by their interpretations of it: namely, that he was destined to conquer the earth" - Suetonius, The Twelve Caesars - Julius Caesar, chapter 7</p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Uncle Pervy » Thu Mar 31, 2005 10:15 pm

It was very much a surprise ending, and I give it two stars up. <p>---------------------------

Your are not supposed to be reading this!</p>

JasonAB17
 

Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby JasonAB17 » Thu Mar 31, 2005 10:22 pm

... Dariwinists the world over are laughing. They may not fully understand why, but they must be. <p><div style="text-align:center">Image</div></p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Kelne » Thu Mar 31, 2005 10:43 pm

Good god. How did the kid even survive to that age with a parent like that? <p>KnightsofSquare: DarkLordKelne is a tomboy bunnygirl, jealous of the business successes of her 37 older brothers, she is pursuing her own business degree in hopes of someday initiating a hostile takeover against her brothers' corporations.</p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby pd Rydia » Thu Mar 31, 2005 11:11 pm

My job would be lost so many times over in a situation like that.

I wonder if the security officer will get the mother's name through the sister, and get any child services into the act. I sure hope so. <p>
<div style="text-align:center">"Pants are bad!!! We should wear pants only on our head you conformist bastard!!! Pants are the devils work!! Run freee!! And pantless!!!" -- Vulture</div>
</p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby PriamNevhausten » Fri Apr 01, 2005 4:45 am

These kind of situations are what gave me my ability to simply walk away from a person while they are talking to me, in order to pursue more relevant concerns (like, in this example, possibly contacting the first aid office). <p><span style="font-size:xx-small;">"It's in the air, in the headlines in the newspapers, in the blurry images on television. It is a secret you have yet to grasp, although the first syllable has been spoken in a dream you cannot quite recall." --Unknown Armies</span></p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Shinigori V2 » Fri Apr 01, 2005 6:57 am

Oh! Oh! Cyanide tastes of almonds, does that mean it's okay to eat!? <p>
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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby pd Rydia » Fri Apr 01, 2005 7:00 am

I keep seeing more and more stories about people who should not be guardians of children. It makes me sad. :[ <p>
<div style="text-align:center">"Pants are bad!!! We should wear pants only on our head you conformist bastard!!! Pants are the devils work!! Run freee!! And pantless!!!" -- Vulture</div>
</p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Uncle Pervy » Fri Apr 01, 2005 7:00 am

YES! Have some with your beverage! <p>---------------------------

Your are not supposed to be reading this!</p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby BrainWalker » Fri Apr 01, 2005 11:18 am

Wow, this thread doesn't need me to emo it up.

I feel... so unnecessary Image <p><div style="text-align:center">Image</div></p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby pd Rydia » Sat Apr 02, 2005 2:34 am

.....
<ul>([info]chokatobuttrfly) wrote in [info]customers_suck,
@ 2005-04-01 23:26:00


Okay, so i wasn't working. I [...] was there earlier to give up my hours obviously, played one round of DDR and left. Right afterwards the person who was working had this happen.


CO: co worker of AWESOMENESS
OCL: oh yes, it is *DUN DUN DUN* ORANGE CLEAN LADY!!!
OCLS: Orange Clean lady's sister


CO: *attending to the prize place*
OCL: I hope you're nicer than the other girl.
CO: Huh? *blink blink*
OCL: Yeah.. can I have that rag? ::points to the rag, already used, with probably windex since it was up front, that is on the counter::
CO: uh.. no...
OCL: Look, I thought you were NICER than that other girl. Can I please have that rag. She owes me a rag.
CO: *blinks... brain clicks* You're Orange Clean lady aren't you?
OCL: *grabs rag and books it, all of a sudden her sister, the little boy, and the sister's two kids follow*
OCLS: Don't worry, she just saved you a lawsuit. Now my nephew will get better.
OC: Because of a RAG? *is trying to motion to someone to help get security*
OCLS: Yep, this is all we needed. We won't be coming here again with this type of service. You WILL be reported. *walks off with the kids*
CO: WTF? *calls security, but they got away*

OMFG.. are our rags a fucking panacea or something? (is that even the right word, panacea?) Are these people DAFT? OH HOLY ARCADE RAG.. PLEASE SAVE OUR FALLEN ONE! *rag glows and bestows upon them IMMORTALITY!!!!!*

If she comes we are now supposed to call police immediately. DSS is being called I believe. Pyscho I tell you.. PSYCHO....</ul> <p>
<div style="text-align:center">"Pants are bad!!! We should wear pants only on our head you conformist bastard!!! Pants are the devils work!! Run freee!! And pantless!!!" -- Vulture</div>
</p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby PriamNevhausten » Sat Apr 02, 2005 2:41 am

That's.....pretty outlandish. I'm starting to look at the date and wonder. <p><span style="font-size:xx-small;">"It's in the air, in the headlines in the newspapers, in the blurry images on television. It is a secret you have yet to grasp, although the first syllable has been spoken in a dream you cannot quite recall." --Unknown Armies</span></p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Idran1701 » Sat Apr 02, 2005 2:43 am

Is there something special about the date today? <p>

"Never let your morals get in the way of doing what is right" - Salvor Hardin
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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby PriamNevhausten » Sat Apr 02, 2005 2:56 am

Like, aside from being within two hours of April Fools? No. <p><span style="font-size:xx-small;">"It's in the air, in the headlines in the newspapers, in the blurry images on television. It is a secret you have yet to grasp, although the first syllable has been spoken in a dream you cannot quite recall." --Unknown Armies</span></p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Idran1701 » Sat Apr 02, 2005 3:07 am

...Eastern time zones ruin everything. <p>

"Never let your morals get in the way of doing what is right" - Salvor Hardin
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Unread postby PriamNevhausten » Sat Apr 02, 2005 3:43 am

Yes. Yes they do. <p><span style="font-size:xx-small;">"It's in the air, in the headlines in the newspapers, in the blurry images on television. It is a secret you have yet to grasp, although the first syllable has been spoken in a dream you cannot quite recall." --Unknown Armies</span></p>

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Unread postby Lauritz Melchior » Sat Apr 02, 2005 3:59 am

Wow! I guess this just goes to show that some people can be stupid. Mind-bogglingly stupid. Painfully stupid. Now, I'm not denying that oranges are great or anything, but Orange Cleanser?

I ended up spending quite a while on that "Customers Suck" website. It's very entertaining.


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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby pd Rydia » Tue Apr 05, 2005 12:39 am

<ul><small>Posted by: whydah.
Time: 4:07 pm.


I work at the Deli counter of a supermarket. I've been there about a month, before I was a kitchen porter/dish-scrubber at a restaurant, so this is my first customer experience.

Most of our customers are just happy, animal carcass buying people who keep their aggression for the cashiers (I think this is directly related to the fact that we don't take cash at the Deli counter).

Still, there have been one or two...

First, the Parmesan Lady. She came up and very briskly demanded I get her some Parmesan cheese. I took a cursory glance over the cheese display, and couldn't find it. My supervisor overheard and piped up to say that we hadn't any, and what had been a clipped but polite tone became an awed, horrified, b-movie bad actress sigh and scream. I reached desperately for the smelling salts as she clutched her stomach, wheezing and crying "BUT I WANT IT FRESH!" whenever we tried to direct her to the cheese aisle. By the time the paramedics had arrived, I'd killed her. Alright, only inside my head, but she created such a scene with her cheese-related hysterics that it was as if she was expecting me to offer to run into the dairy aisle and start churning milk to ferment it into fucking parmesan cheese for her.

---

Next, a persnickety old lady who didn't quite suck as hard as she would have if she weren't completely senile. She was with her daughter, and they didn't know what they wanted. Eventually they decided to taste the ham on the bone. The old lady declared that she liked it, and her daughter immediately chimed in with "Wait! Finish that sample mum, you know it'll just SIT in your fridge if you don't REALLY like it..."
And so the indecision begins. By now, a rather patient, weary looking woman has been staring hungrily at the olives for five minutes or so, while I patiently shoot daggers at two generations of "Oooh, I just don't know!".

Finally, they tell me to go and wait on the olive lady. I apologise to her, and she's very pleasant about it. She also knew exactly what she wanted, how much of it was required and didn't complain because we had no lids for the tubs. So I'm wrapping her stuff and the old lady cries "I'M STILL WAITING FOR YOOOOU."
"You told me to serve this lady first! I am!"
"Oh!"
I walk by her again.
"I want the ham -"
"YOU, told ME, to SERVE THIS LADY first!" I repeat cheerfully, handing the lady her olives.
So I return, and she chooses which ham she wants, and she says again "It took you long enough!"

ARGH. WTF, IT TOOK YOU TWICE AS LONG YOU HALF-CRAZED, FOAMING OLD WOMAN! I fully advocate people who do shopping for the elderly, I think it ought to be a legal requirement once they go beyond a certain stage. And the daughter, alleged fogey wrangler, was no help whatsoever either.

[...]

---

If you stand pompously next to the self-serve salad bar and glare at me, I will not know what that means. That is a SELF SERVE area. It's not my problem that you are getting poor service from YOURSELF. If you want a cooked chicken, stand at the chicken counter, a mere four feet to your left, then I will skip up the Deli and stab a chicken in the ass for you, without question. Don't yell "CAN I HAVE A CHICKEN, PLEASE?" as if I have bared my ass at you and cried "In your FACE, lady at the salad bar! IN YOUR FACE!". Because I was washing dishes, in actual fact.

Sincerely,

[info]whydah</small></ul> <p>
<div style="text-align:center">"Pants are bad!!! We should wear pants only on our head you conformist bastard!!! Pants are the devils work!! Run freee!! And pantless!!!" -- Vulture</div>
</p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Reako Somner » Tue Apr 05, 2005 12:56 am

I have just as many stories if not more from my 3 years of service to the Wendy's Corporation :(

While it was a solid job, the rage it caused, caused me to leave. The longer I stayed the more I lost hope in humanity.

Edited by: [url=http://p068.ezboard.com/brpgww60462.showUserPublicProfile?gid=reakosomner>Reako] at: 4/5/05 0:57

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby KingOfDoma » Tue Apr 05, 2005 1:05 am

Wow, Reako. I just got my third evaluation (for the uninitiated, that's the 1.5 year mark), and I'm wondering whether or not I should find a gun and kill the annoying Asian kid... how'd you survive that long?

Also: I'll share a horror story if you do... <p>--------------------
UT! No complaining! If you didn't want to be slaves, you should have told your parents to put up a less pitiful defense against the TIK'LA! Mm? Did any of you do that? I didn't think so...

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby pd Rydia » Tue Apr 05, 2005 2:06 am

<ul><small>Posted by: fahrenheitbbv.
Time: 1:17 am.


It's bad enough we lost an hour of sleep this weekend, but some people refuse to believe it.

It's 12:15 am, the store is closed, the tills are counted, the cleaning's done, Laura and I are just going around the store straightening, when we get a call.

CTT: Can't tell time
Me: Seriously, leave me alone.

CTT: Hi, can you put a movie aside for me?
Me: Sorry, we're closed.
CTT: Closed? But it's only 11:15!
Me: No, it's 12:15.
CTT: No, it's 11:15!
Me: Did you forget to move your clock ahead?
CTT: Move my clock ahead?
Me: You were supposed to move your clock ahead last night.
CTT: Why the hell am I supposed to do that?
Me: It's Daylight Savings Time, sir, the clocks change.
CTT: Don't you think Blockbuster should tell people about this thing?
Me: This isn't a Blockbuster thing, sir, almost the whole country does this.
CTT: Well, I think you should have given people advance notice that you were going to start closing at 11!
Me: Sir, we don't close at 11, we close at 12.
CTT: Well, it's 11:15, and you're telling me you're closed!
Me: The clocks have moved ahead. It's 12:15, we're closed.
CTT: That's bullshit. I'm coming down, and you're going to let me in and get a movie, because it's 11:15, you're not supposed to be closed!
Me: We won't be open, sir.
CTT: Well, I'm coming, and you'd better be! Goodbye! *click*
Me: (to Laura) I think it's time to go.

So Laura went home, but I decided to wait in my car and see if this guy showed up. Minutes later, a guy comes up, jiggles on the door, and yells "Let me in!" a few times. When he finally gave up, I saw him pulling out a piece of paper, writing something down and slipping it into the dropbox. I can't wait to see what that says. Should be good for a laugh.

Edit

Dear Sirs

I just wanted to let you know that your employee who was working Sunday night closed early. He tried to tell me that you had changed your clocks and that's why you could close an hour early without telling anyone. I was unable to get a movie because of this, and I am very unsatisfied.

It's nice to know Blockbuster can have their own little time zones apart from everyone else.

Sincerely
CTT</small></ul> <p>
<div style="text-align:center">"Pants are bad!!! We should wear pants only on our head you conformist bastard!!! Pants are the devils work!! Run freee!! And pantless!!!" -- Vulture</div>
</p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby PriamNevhausten » Tue Apr 05, 2005 4:44 am

I love how people think it's their constitutional right to get whatever they want whenever they want. I make it a specific point to find something else to do (i.e. stock the cups, work on the condiment stand, find a manager to bug about random bullshit, whatever) when I detect such a person in line. They will LEARN to wait. <p><span style="font-size:xx-small;">"It's in the air, in the headlines in the newspapers, in the blurry images on television. It is a secret you have yet to grasp, although the first syllable has been spoken in a dream you cannot quite recall." --Unknown Armies</span></p>

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Unread postby pd Rydia » Tue Apr 05, 2005 12:36 pm

My love for these people is also abundant. Someone posted about how some old lady bitched her out and stiffed her on a tip because she couldn't provide her with minute-by-minute updates on the Pope's condition. Sorry, woman, you get a waitress, not a newscaster. :[ <p>
<div style="text-align:center">"Pants are bad!!! We should wear pants only on our head you conformist bastard!!! Pants are the devils work!! Run freee!! And pantless!!!" -- Vulture</div>
</p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby SALSAlys » Wed Apr 06, 2005 10:46 am

Oh dear.

I have a bit more fear of going into the working world now.


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Unread postby PriamNevhausten » Wed Apr 06, 2005 10:58 am

You should.

Be afraid. Be very afraid. <p><span style="font-size:xx-small;">"It's in the air, in the headlines in the newspapers, in the blurry images on television. It is a secret you have yet to grasp, although the first syllable has been spoken in a dream you cannot quite recall." --Unknown Armies</span></p>

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Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Zemyla » Wed Apr 06, 2005 12:54 pm

Like I said, I'm going to get a job where I never have to interact with people.

The Morlocks are hiring, right? <p>-----
Do not taunt Happy Fun Zemyla.

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Dammit, Dan, I'm not dating a damn NPC! - OOC Will (Will Baseton)
Of course! Anything worth doing is worth doing completely wrong! - Travis English
Ultimately, wizards and clerics don't say, "Gee, I want to become a lich because weapons hurt less and I don't have to worry about being backstabbed; that whole 'eternal life' thing is just a fringe benefit."-Darklion
But this one time I killed a walrus with my bare hands, and I suddenly understood spherical coordinates. - KnightsofSquare</span>

Adventurers! | RPG World World | The Phantom Lord's OT Board mkII | Indie Madnesse | Brotherhood of Elitist Bastards</p>

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Ganonfro
 
Posts: 955
Joined: Mon Sep 09, 2002 9:25 pm

Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Ganonfro » Wed Apr 06, 2005 1:05 pm

Lys, whatever you do, don't become a convenience store clerk. Unless you work mornings/in a small community. IT WILL ROT YOUR SOUL. I've been re-evaluating my time last summer working at a Hess express in Binghamton, and come to realize there is no hope in humanity, or retarded people who believe money will solve all their emotional and physical problems, because lord knows there's no way to fix their mental ones... That, and there are alot of druggies in Binghamton.


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Justice Augustus
Administrator
 
Posts: 1634
Joined: Tue Apr 23, 2002 6:28 am

Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Justice Augustus » Wed Apr 06, 2005 3:02 pm

I hope everyone here has seen the film Clerks.
<p>

"Moreover, when on the following night, much to his dismay, [Caesar] had a dream of raping his own mother, the soothsayers greatly encouraged him by their interpretations of it: namely, that he was destined to conquer the earth" - Suetonius, The Twelve Caesars - Julius Caesar, chapter 7</p>

Lauritz Melchior
 

Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Lauritz Melchior » Wed Apr 06, 2005 10:31 pm

So, I was reading through the Customers Suck site again, and came across this:

Her Burger

I burst out laughing. It's the exact image of my aunt.


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Zemyla
 
Posts: 1500
Joined: Tue Apr 23, 2002 11:01 am

Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Zemyla » Thu Apr 07, 2005 8:31 am

I found the idiot who said "The customer is always right". He died in poverty, which says a lot about the quality of his business practices. <p>-----
Do not taunt Happy Fun Zemyla.

<span style="font-size:xx-small;">I think boobs are the lesser of two evils. - Inverse (Pervy)
Dammit, Dan, I'm not dating a damn NPC! - OOC Will (Will Baseton)
Of course! Anything worth doing is worth doing completely wrong! - Travis English
Ultimately, wizards and clerics don't say, "Gee, I want to become a lich because weapons hurt less and I don't have to worry about being backstabbed; that whole 'eternal life' thing is just a fringe benefit."-Darklion
But this one time I killed a walrus with my bare hands, and I suddenly understood spherical coordinates. - KnightsofSquare
Also, when you've worked a 36-hour shift as an intern you too just might pour yourself a catful of coffee and sit down to cuddle with your travel mug. -eirehound
</span>

Adventurers! | RPG World World | The Phantom Lord's OT Board mkII | Indie Madnesse | Brotherhood of Elitist Bastards</p>

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Jak Snide
 
Posts: 5457
Joined: Tue Apr 23, 2002 7:14 am
Location: London

Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Jak Snide » Thu Apr 07, 2005 8:36 am

Wow, Putney! That place has the dirtiest public pool I've ever seen!


JasonAB17
 

Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby JasonAB17 » Thu Apr 07, 2005 10:04 am

LM: ... Woooow. o_o ... No seriously. I think that has to be the stupidest thing I've heard in my entire life. That couldn't have been worse if the caller had been speaking in 1337.


... Wow. o_o <p><div style="text-align:center">Image</div></p>

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Zemyla
 
Posts: 1500
Joined: Tue Apr 23, 2002 11:01 am

Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Zemyla » Thu Apr 07, 2005 10:29 am

Lady: Fuxx0r c4mp3rs won't give me my l33t burger!
911: Pwned. <p>-----
Do not taunt Happy Fun Zemyla.

<span style="font-size:xx-small;">I think boobs are the lesser of two evils. - Inverse (Pervy)
Dammit, Dan, I'm not dating a damn NPC! - OOC Will (Will Baseton)
Of course! Anything worth doing is worth doing completely wrong! - Travis English
Ultimately, wizards and clerics don't say, "Gee, I want to become a lich because weapons hurt less and I don't have to worry about being backstabbed; that whole 'eternal life' thing is just a fringe benefit."-Darklion
But this one time I killed a walrus with my bare hands, and I suddenly understood spherical coordinates. - KnightsofSquare
Also, when you've worked a 36-hour shift as an intern you too just might pour yourself a catful of coffee and sit down to cuddle with your travel mug. -eirehound
</span>

Adventurers! | RPG World World | The Phantom Lord's OT Board mkII | Indie Madnesse | Brotherhood of Elitist Bastards</p>

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Ganonfro
 
Posts: 955
Joined: Mon Sep 09, 2002 9:25 pm

Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby Ganonfro » Thu Apr 07, 2005 7:42 pm

Were they the campers at the Burger King, camping the spawn point and selling them to kids for far mor than they are made?


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PriamNevhausten
Holy Order of the Crimson Ballpoint
 
Posts: 2854
Joined: Fri Aug 09, 2002 4:10 pm

Re: Dia brings you: Random Web HI-Larity!

Unread postby PriamNevhausten » Fri Apr 08, 2005 7:56 am

See, and people wonder why 911 operators can take a while to answer calls. It's because of the rest of the population being dumbfucks. <p><span style="font-size:xx-small;">"It's in the air, in the headlines in the newspapers, in the blurry images on television. It is a secret you have yet to grasp, although the first syllable has been spoken in a dream you cannot quite recall." --Unknown Armies</span></p>


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