Oh no Dia is of ficcy trying?

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pd Rydia
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Re: ... Conclusion of Ellyn story ... or is it?

Unread postby pd Rydia » Wed Aug 21, 2002 8:29 am

A winner! As you have been critiqued I can find nothing to add but "I like it" Keep up your unique flair ~love~ mom :0) <p><font color=navy><hr width="47%"><small>Hello, my name is Dia. I'm a dragongirl, and I bite. RAWR!<hr width="31%">Quotes of the moment:
-=- "Love is when your brain stops working." -- White Knight
-=- "Love is when 72 billion monkeys steal a porsche and drive it off a cliff." -- SuperRube
-=- "Love is an intricate dance of lewd comments and biting." -- Lord McBastard</font></p>

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Nick Shogun
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Unread postby Nick Shogun » Wed Aug 21, 2002 9:10 pm


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pd Rydia
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Re: ...

Unread postby pd Rydia » Wed Aug 21, 2002 9:35 pm

I'm logged in on my mom's computer, and she decided to read and comment to my fic. >.> *thought that was kind of obvious, but hey* <p><font color=navy><hr width="47%"><small>Hello, my name is Dia. I'm a dragongirl, and I bite. RAWR!<hr width="31%">Quotes of the moment:
-=- "Love is when your brain stops working." -- White Knight
-=- "Love is when 72 billion monkeys steal a porsche and drive it off a cliff." -- SuperRube
-=- "Love is an intricate dance of lewd comments and biting." -- Lord McBastard</font></p>

Uncle Pervy

Re: ... Conclusion of Ellyn story ... or is it?

Unread postby Uncle Pervy » Thu Aug 22, 2002 6:51 am


The ending feels a little too hopeful, given Ellyn's deranged, angry nature.

I wanna see some vengeful brooding! I wanna hear the various tortures she has planned for Ruel! (Sp; I'm going by memory) I want some crazed ramblings worthy of Kefka! I wantr her to scream "MAY THE RATS TAKE YOUR EYES!" and start invoking the power of Xel'latoth for revenge!

That sorta thing. The Ending you have now isn't bad, but I would think her feeling more vengeful than anything else.


Hi Mom ^^ *Waves* <p><table align="center" cellpadding=2><tr><td>Image</td><td align="center">Rum, White Magic, an' Cabbits.
That's th' life fer me.

Seig No-Pants!</td><td>Image</tr></table></p>


Re: ... Conclusion of Ellyn story ... or is it?

Unread postby Choark » Thu Aug 22, 2002 11:25 am

Sorry for not being able to put down anything else but...

I enjoyed the story. Its that simple *shrugs* It was fun to read.

Sorry, thats all I can say.



Unread postby whiteknightdelta » Thu Aug 22, 2002 5:44 pm

Hmm...I like the story, and how it brings me up to the present situation that I know about. ^_^ Good job!

However, I feel like the italics kind of lost their original focus in the last part. I didn't get quite as powerful a sense of the voice's malignity.

But still, an excellent story. ^_^

-White Knight

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pd Rydia
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Re: Meow

Unread postby pd Rydia » Wed Jan 08, 2003 10:59 am

Thanks to everyone with your help and feedback to this story.

As with my other two, I'm looking for a title for this, and any help would be appreciated. Any further comments would, too, before I start to revise it. <p>
<span style="font-size:xx-small;">Barge: *raises his sword* Game... *twirls it* Set... *smirk*
Big Fat Chocobo: *a big fat chocobo falls on the demon Barge* ^)-(^
Rydia: ...and...squish?
Hakaril: .......Dia? Did YOU do that?
Rydia: *stares* o_O ...I think so.
Hakaril: ...that's great!
Richard: O.O WOAH. Remind me NEVER to get YOU mad, Dia. O.O;;;;
Idran: So remember everyone. Crushing works good on demons.</span></p>

Uncle Pervy

Re: Meow

Unread postby Uncle Pervy » Wed Jan 08, 2003 1:04 pm

Lost. <p><div style="text-align:center">Image Image Image Image Image ImageImage</div></p>

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pd Rydia
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Re: Meow

Unread postby pd Rydia » Mon Jun 02, 2003 1:44 am

Yes. I think it's nigh time I revise this, and stuff.

Tomorrow. <p>
<span style="font-size:xx-small;">-=- "YOU SEE THE MIGHTY DAMARAMU'S BRAIN IS VERY COMPACT!" -- Damaramu
-=- "Don't worry Mink, I'll be good excess baggage!" -- Pia
-=- "But I'm a slime half!" -- Princess Vena
-=- "OH BY THE SEVEN GODS IT'S A MECHANICAL BIRD! But it's so...small..." -- announcer guy
-=- "Demons don't care about story continuity!" -- Doug Finn</span></p>

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pd Rydia
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Unread postby pd Rydia » Mon Jun 02, 2003 6:14 pm

'Kay, I've gone through and fixed up the first half of the story. I marked (most) edits in blue. Responses and further critiques welcome.


"Journal of
"Ellyn Josselya L’Kathara"

The little girl hugged her journal, then carefully tucked it away in her tiny wooden chest safely. She would probably forget it was there...she was always forgetting her journal. Luckily, the voice would remind her if she did lose it.

Ellyn had talked to her momma about the voices once. Momma had said they were her "sense" talking to her. Ellyn thought that was funny, because she did not know she had sense -- she did not even know what sense was! But she had the idea it was something bad, because when she tentatively mentioned sense and the voices once to her neighbor, Mister L'Holmet, he gave her a funny look and changed the subject. He kind of stopped talking to her after that.

Then again, nobody ever talked to her or her family much, anyway. Papa said it was because they were shadow dragons, but Ellyn never understood that. In the sprawling city of Fatier there were earth dragons and sky dragons, fire dragons and ice dragons, but none of the other dragons were given the silent treatment -- just the single shadow dragon family. Ellyn's family.

Well, her neighbors may have ignored her parents, and her parents seemed willing to leave them to their peace, but Ellyn was too curious for her own good. The little girl visited all her neighbors, striking up lively conversations, asking myriad questions, and helping out with chores. Her neighbors smiled and treated the young girl politely, but for some reason as she grew older, they grew more distant and cold. Maybe, a voice whispered, they were really that way to begin with, and you never noticed.

She shook her head from her musings. The voices interrupted her thoughts at the most curious moments. Sometimes they said rude things about her friends and neighbors, but then again, the voices were always there for her. As her neighbors stopped talking to her, the voices were there to keep her company.

You’re coming to visit <font color=blue>us</font>, right?

That is what she forgot! Ellyn felt chided -- no wonder the voice had interrupted her thoughts. She had something to do today.

"I’m going outside, Momma!" she called out, heading swiftly for the door.

Momma frowned and began to say something, but Ellyn was quick, and was already out the door and heading away from the house by the time her mother could react. Momma shook her head and smiled reluctantly at her daughter, waving a hand at her retreating back.

Momma probably thought she was going to visit neighbors or explore trails again. Well, she was, really. but this was a different neighbor and these would be new trails. Ellyn was not worried about getting lost, though. She had her voices to guide her to the right place.


Left now...that's right...

What a good girl...

Ellyn had been walking forever...she was now farther away from home than she'd ever been. Was this even part of Fatier?

No, it's deeper into the Shuman Mountains than that...


We're waiting to meet you.

Sometimes, Ellyn mused, it was hard to tell when the voices were themselves or her own thoughts. Today, however, they were clearly and distinctly themselves, and the farther she trekked, the more clear it was that the voices belonged to individuals. They were people just like her -- not Momma's "Sense" and not her neighbor's "Rai," either.

Ellyn hurried her pace, eager to finally meet the friends she had known for so long.


<font color=blue>Time passed quickly, and </font>finally, Ellyn scrambled up the last rock. She didn't need the voices to tell her she had reached her destination -- she knew.

"I'm here!" she annouced enthusiastically.


"Where are you?" she asked, brushing a strand of dark brown hair back from her face. Was this a game? Why were they not here?

Even though she was in her human form, she was crouched down on her hands and knees, perched upon a boulder easily twice her size. From her vantage point, she looked around.

She had been traveling up a mountainside almost the whole time. She wasn't near the top by any means, but she was still a good deal above Fatier. Some of the homes of the village were visible from where she was, including her own -- they only appeared as mere specks below, however. She had traveled far. She had traveled far to meet her friends.

So where were they?

"Hello?" Still, her friends remained ominously silent, like the neighbors who don't have the heart to tell a little shadow dragon they despised her for what she is. Ellyn shook her head of such thoughts. These were her friends.

Where were her friends? They were her friends, right? Her friends should be here.

She glanced west, just in time to watch the last sliver of crimson sun dip below the mountainous horizon. Momma was going to throw a fit when she got home. She might call Papa to yell at her, too. She bit her lip and called out again.

"Where are you?" Slight panic had creeped into her voice by now. She hopped down from her boulder, stumbling slightly. Frantically, she began to search the small ledge.

The ledge was bathed in twilight shadows, which were steadily deepening. Ellyn jumped, heart beating furiously, as three tall figures emerged from behind a large rock slab. She gaped, mouth dropping open and eyes staring.

Her friends were here!

"Hello," the woman of the group greeted her, voice low, soft, and kind. She smiled compassionately at Ellyn, kneeling down and opening her arms wide.

The young girl ran over quickly, hugging her friend happily. "You're here! You really are!"

"Of course," the man behind just behind the woman said, smiling faintly. "Real friends would always come."

"We've wanted to meet you," the woman asserted, breaking their embrace and standing up. "Our friend, Ellyn." The smile never left her face, her voice was level and compelling -- the voice of someone you could trust. She was beautiful, too -- her silver hair framed her delicate face perfectly, and complimented her bright blue skin. Ellyn watched her in pure admiration, wordless.

The third member of the group was standing farther away from the rest, leaning against a wall, watching everything. Ellyn glanced at him worriedly. Why was he so quiet? Was he upset? Had she done something wrong? Had she disappointed him somehow?

He suddenly flashed her a winning smile, bright white teeth contrasting with his dark blue skin. "Of course not, Ellyn." Had she spoken her concerns aloud, she wondered curiously. She must have...

He grinned in a friendly manner, and knelt by her. "You're exactly what we expected...and you're everything we could ever hope for."


Ellyn lost track of the time as she and her friends --Decia, Maipin, and Ruel-- talked and got to know each other. The twilight faded into night and the mountainside grew as dark as Papa's scales before Ellyn even realized it. Maipin was the one who eventually reminded her.

"It's very dark out, isn't it?" he commented offhandedly, interrupting a story Ellyn was telling Decia about Fatier.

"Yeah, it is," the young girl responded, finally noticing it herself.

"Does the darkness scare you?" he asked, that funny faint smile of his tugging at his lips.

Ellyn frowned a bit, feeling teased. "No. I'm not afraid of the dark. I don't know why other dragons ever are."

"You can see just fine in the dark, can't you?"

"Well, yeah...I can..."

"That's because..." Maipin's smile grew. "You were born of shadow."


"That's why you are called a shadow dragon. It's because you are...special."

Ellyn beamed. She was special. Momma and Papa always said she was special, but it somehow meant more when her friends said it. And maybe, now, she understood why her neighbors shunned her and her family. Because the Kathara were shadow dragons, and others dragons were jealous because they were special.

<font color=blue>Special like the drow.


Ellyn looked up, frowning. Momma and Papa had talked about drow before, speaking of them as one speaks of something...distasteful and dangerous. Tentatively, she asked, "Are you...are you drow?"

Decia and Maipin exchanged glances. "Yes, we are," Maipin asserted simply.

"But..." Ellyn said, face scrunching up in worry. "Momma said drow..."

Decia reached out a hand, smoothing loose hair out of Ellyn's face. It was a reassuring, friendly touch. "Some people talk bad about drow. But it's because they don't understand. You know what it's like when people don't understand, don't you?"

Ellyn thought back to when she tried to tell Momma and Mister L'Holmet about the voices. "Yeah..." she agreed slowly. "Sometimes people don't understand..."

"Well..." Decia's smooth and gentle voice put Ellyn's worries about drow to rest. "Maybe you should head home now...it is late."</font>

"Already?" Ellyn exclaimed. "But I'm having so much fun getting to talk to you finally!"

The woman smiled and kissed her on the forehead. "I'm sure your parents are worried. We can meet up again sometime."

The dragon shook her head, but noticed that Maipin and Ruel were already out of sight. They must have things they needed to do. "O-- okay...I guess I should really go home now."

Decia smiled --her beautiful, kind smile-- and said, quietly, "Safe journey." She turned around and walked away -- even though she was walking slowly, she disappeared from sight quickly, leaving Ellyn blinking in confusion.

With a sigh, the little girl started trekking back down the mountain.


It was late, and very, very dark. If it weren't for the fact that shadow dragons were gifted with night vision, Ellyn would not have been able to see her way. As it was, she made steady progress, but it still took a while to work her way down the mountainside.

The sounds of night filled the forest -- tree branches swayed and creaked in the wind, brush rustled as little creatures darted to and fro, and insects filled the air with their droning. It was, all in all, very peaceful, actually. The forest life barely paid any attention to Ellyn as she made her way back toward Fatier.

Soon, however, she became aware of a commotion in the distance; something or other shattered the normal nighttime noise of the forest. <font color=blue>Ellyn's face twisted in concentration, trying to figure out what it was.

The forest grew deathly quiet directly around her. And then...</font>

"Ellyn Josselya L'Kathara!" barked out a deep, disapproving voice behind her. Ellyn startled, and turned around to face her father reluctantly.

"Papa," she mumbled, her mind filling with dread. He looked mad.

"And just where have you been young lady?"

"I was out--"

"Trapsing around at night in the forest! Your mother thought something had happened to you..."

"But I'm alright! Nothing bad happened, I can see FINE in the dark, nothing bad--"

"The darkness isn't what you have to worry about," he said shortly, stopping just short of growling at his daughter. He took a deep breath, appearing to calm himself, before continuing. "It's what roams in the darkness."

Ellyn pouted, unimpressed. "I'm just fine, Papa, really..."

"Your mother has been worried sick," he responded sternly. "Come on, we're going home."

"Yes, Papa," she replied quietly. It would figure...the day that her father actually took time out to talk to her, he was yelling at her. It wasn't fair...it was like he only paid attention to his daughter if he was angry at her.

Sullenly, she followed her dad home. As predicted, her mother threw a fit when she got home. If Ellyn herself had acted the way Momma did, they'd say she was having a tantrum, but, of course, adults don't have tantrums. The girl took her parents' chastising bravely, and finally slinked off to her room to finally go to bed.

<font color=blue>She laid awake on her bed for a long time, thinking about the day. Despite getting into trouble with her parents, she was still excited and happy. After such a long wait, she'd finally met her friends! She rolled over to her side, the day's events repeating over and over in her head, before the sound of the crickets outside finally lulled her to sleep.


That night, Ellyn had a curious dream. She was running through the forest, running away from something; she was quite scared of whatever was chasing her. Decia's voice, cool and smooth, wreathed through her mind, telling her to be careful. Suddenly, her pursuer leaped out of the brush, and -- it was her papa! He was in full dragon form and growling angrily, front claws scuffling the ground...and his eyes glowed red. The last thing Ellyn remembered was Decia telling her to run...

Then she woke up.</font>


Ellyn woke up slowly the next day, blinking from the sunlight that spilled into her room through the window. It must have been early afternoon, she thought groggily, rubbing at her eyes sleepily. The brightness made a sharp contrast to the comforting darkness of sleep. Trying to block out the light, Ellyn buried her head into her pillow. The cool darkness against her face reminded her of a dream from the night before...but as soon as she tried to remember it, the memory flitted away, hovering teasingly just out of reach of her brain. She hated it when that happened.

With a sigh, she sat up reluctantly, dragging covers up against her chin and just sitting in her bed for a moment. Like the other inhabitants of Fatier, the family Kathara spent most of their time in their two-legged form, and Ellyn was no exception. Papa had tried explaining it once to Ellyn -- it had something to do with space, food, and hunters, or something, apparently. It did not make a lot of sense to the young girl but she obeyed her parents' rules obediently...for the most part.

Ellyn sighed -- she wanted to spend more time in her dragon form. She also wanted her father to take time out to teach her how to hunt; he had been promising to do so for a long time, but he kept putting it off. Ellyn had finally gotten him to promise to teach her this weekend, but now she worried that he wouldn't anymore, since she had gotten into trouble. Even though he'd promised, he might put it off. Again.
Deciding that she'd delayed getting up as long as possible, Ellyn reluctantly rolled out of bed and opened the door to the hallway. To judge from the sounds, Momma was in the kitchen; she guessed that Papa was probably in the other bedroom, sleeping. He might be out hunting, too.

Creeping down the hallway, Ellyn poked her head around the corner and peeked into the kitchen, trying to judge Momma's mood.

"You just missed lunch," Momma said, startling Ellyn. The girl could swear her mother had eyes on the back of her head sometimes. "You'll have to wait till suppertime for a meal...there's a roll on the table for you to eat until then."

Ellyn scooped up the roll and munched it in grateful silence. If Papa were here, she wouldn't have even had the roll to eat, but Momma was more lenient and understanding about things. Papa was harsh in his discipline, and Ellyn felt lucky that she had gotten out of last night with only a talking to and a missed meal.

Standing up, Ellyn shoved the last piece of bread into her mouth and headed for the door, but Momma stopped her with a look.

"Where do you think you're going, young lady?"

"Outside to play...I'll stay in our yard! I promise!"

"No, you won't." Momma shook her head. "Papa says you're grounded. You'll stay inside the house for the next week."

Ellyn's lower jaw dropped at Momma's pronouncement. "But Momma...!"

"No buts, young lady." Momma shook her head again, looking stern. "You could have been seriously hurt last night."

"No I WOULDN'T have! If anything bad would've happened, the voic--my friends would have told me--"

Momma frowned in Ellyn's direction, stopping her sentence halfway through. "I don't want to hear it. You're to stay in your room to think about what you did wrong. You can come to the kitchen at mealtimes only."

"But what about Papa teaching me how to hunt?"

"You'll just have to wait a while longer to learn," Momma replied.

Ellyn knew it. Face fallen, spirit deflated, and hopes crushed, she slinked back towards her room.

It's not fair! she thought as she pounded an angry fist into her pillow. She hadn't been doing anything wrong, her parents just didn't understand. She had just been visiting her friends, what was so wrong about that? She hadn't been and wouldn't have been hurt, her parents were just being irrational and unfair. For all that they talked about Ellyn needing to go out and make friends, in the end they were just lying, because when she did, they got upset with her.

Finally, she burst into tears at the injustice of it all, crying until she grew a throbbing headache between her scratchy eyes and her lungs ached with each breath.

It's okay... Was that Decia's voice? Or was that Ellyn's thoughts? We'll meet again sometime.

That was right, too. Sniffling back the last of her tears, Ellyn pulled out her journal. Writing in it always made her feel better, and it would help pass the time until her punishment was over. Then she could find a way to meet up with her friends again.


No sooner had Ellyn's punishment been up than she once again visited her friends. She soon began to regularly visit her friends, sometimes weekly, sometimes every few weeks, depending upon her parents' resulting punishments when she returned from the last trip. Almost every time she left to meet up with the others, it was dark by the time she returned home; Decia explained to Ellyn that the sunlight hurt their eyes.

<font color=blue>Her hunting lessons were postponed again and again, as </font>grounding became a regular occurrence. Each time that Ellyn returned home after dark, her parents would punish her, but to their exasperation, it seemed to have no effect on their recalcitrant daughter. No amount of grounding, chores, extra lessons, or chiding could deter their daughter from her excursions. Instead, Ellyn gradually learned how to sneak around behind her parents' backs and lie in order to make her trips. Within months, she began to meet her parents' chastising with angry words -- where there was none before, there was now quite a bit of fighting in the Kathara household, which caused no end of gossip in Fatier.

Ellyn gradually grew resentful and rebelious, angry at her parents for their lack of understanding and continual punishments. Eventually, communication with her family broke down; she still talked to her parents, but only using the most necessary of words. Ellyn grew quiet and withdrawn, only truly opening up when she was with her friends, in whom she confided all her worries and complaints. They were always sympathetic, even as Ellyn and her parents grew more and more apart.

Ellyn sat at the dinner table one night, daydreaming about the next day and playing with the food on her plate. She was excited --tomorrow she was going to visit her friends again, after a long time of not seeing them-- but she carefully hid her excitement under a mask of emotionlessness. If her parents knew she was excited, they could guess what she would try to do again tomorrow.

Momma and Papa shared worried glances. They probably had never grown accustomed to a quiet dinnertable -- the innocent chatter of a happy, obedient young girl used to fill the kitchen with empty words about neighbors, lessons, and trees. Ellyn idly wondered what happened to that girl...she didn't know who she was anymore. She knew her parents wanted her back...but she was gone forever now. Ellyn wasn't sad that she was gone.

Momma gave Papa a significant look. Papa finished chewing his food, swallowed carefully, and cleared his throat. He raised his eyes from his plate to look across the table at his daughter.


"Yes Papa?" she replied, voice as carefully emotionless as her face.

Papa cleared his throat again, looking as if he wasn't quite sure how to word what he was about to say. Finally, he seemed to figure it out. "How would you like to come out in the forest with me tomorrow and learn how to hunt?" he asked.

Pretense at emotionlessness shattered, Ellyn's eyes widened and her fork halted in its figure-eight path on her plate. Hunting? Really? With Papa? Finally? Maybe...Papa wasn't so bad after all...maybe if they actually spent time together tomorrow, then she could finally explain about why she was always leaving the house and coming back so late. Maybe he'd understand and they would stop punishing her...

But we thought you were coming to visit us tomorrow... Decia's voice interrupted Ellyn's line of thinking, only the hurt tone making it distinguishable from her own thoughts. Carefully, Ellyn reconstructed her mask. Papa had almost made her betray her friends.

"No thanks..." she mumbled, returning to picking at her food.


One day Ellyn woke up to the sound of arguing in the kitchen.

"My daughter is not rai..." her father growled. Who was he talking to? Momma?

"You...you know it just happens sometimes with the...a-any dragon..." stuttered the voice of her neighbor, Mister L'Holmet. He sounded worried and nervous, and Ellyn wasn't surprised at that; it sounded like Papa was really mad at him, and no one in Fatier wanted Papa mad at them.

"Ellyn is just going through a phase." This time it was Momma's voice that spoke up, but she didn't sound as sure of herself as Papa did. Briefly Ellyn wondered, once again, whatever happened to the little girl her parents missed. Momma had good reason to be uncertain, she decided silently, creeping closer to the kitchen to hear better.

"There's no need to worry about our daughter's grip on reality," Papa's voice was low and dangerous. Even Ellyn knew better than to argue with him when he sounded like that...what was Mister L'Holmet thinking?

"But...the voices, do you remember those?" he piped up. An awkward silence followed, which L'Holmet decided to interrupt himself. "What kind of...n-normal child hears...little voices in her head...I-I-I mean..."

"Those are just Ellyn's imaginary friends," Momma explained dismissively, wearing the look of someone stubbornly clinging to the first excuse that comes to mind. "Lots of kids have imaginary--"

"They're not imaginary!" Ellyn yelled, startling herself by her own, sudden anger. Somewhat sheepishly, she stepped around the corner to the kitchen, and glared at the three grown-ups in the room. Her parents wore dubious expressions on their face which practically shouted their disbelief. Why wouldn't her own parents believe what she said?

Mister L'Holmet's face reflected a rapid succession of emotion, from similar disbelief to thoughtful to worried. He edged a bit closer to Ellyn, earning a glare from Papa. Ignoring the look, he addressed Ellyn. "Your friends...they're real?"

"Of course they are!" she replied angrily, sending a quick, angry look in the direction of her parents. She could tell, they still didn't believe her.

"Wh, what do they look like?" he continued -- he was trying to sound soothing, but he just came out nervous. Either way, Papa blinked and Momma looked startled; apparently, they had believed so strongly that her friends were imaginary that the idea of asking what they looked like had never occurred to them.

It hadn't really occurred to Ellyn, either, for some reason -- she could prove her friends were real by describing them! Somewhere in the back of her head something was warning her to remain silent, but she ignored the voice and went ahead, talking quickly and with energy. "Their names are Decia, Maipin, and Ruel, and they look like blue-skinned elves -- they have little pointed ears like elves, you see? But their skin is blue. And they all have long white hair and Ruel wears his in a ponytail and Decia--"

It suddenly occurred to Ellyn that all three of the adults were staring at her in wide-eyed surprise. Momma looked distressed and Mister L'Holmet looked positively fearful. She trailed off and looked from Papa to Momma to Mister L'Holmet in silence, trying to discern what was wrong.

"Oh, oh my..." Mister L'Holmet muttered. He began to edge away from Ellyn, heading oh-so-insubtlely toward the door.

Papa's look of bemused shock was quickly replaced by a look of dark anger as he intercepted Mister L'Holmet. The sound of short, angry, muted words came from the living room where the two were, but Ellyn couldn't hear what was being said. Was Papa threatening Mister L'Holmet? Why would he do that...?

"Momma, what's wrong? What did I say?" Ellyn asked, glancing at her mother in worry.

Momma pursed her lips. "Go to your room, Ellyn. We'll talk in a bit."


"Now, young lady!"

Momma's look brooked no argument. Confused and slightly alarmed by the unusual circumstances, Ellyn decided to obey her mother, and retreated to her room.

She closed the door behind her and jumped on her bed, only to roll away as her ribs hit against something hard. Digging under the covers, she pulled out the journal Papa had given her -- she must have left it in the bed when she crept out to listen to the others arguing. Pulling the cover open, she grabbed a pencil and began scribbling away. She needed to record this new strangeness in an entry.

"I woke up today to hear Momma and Papa arguing with Mister L'Homet. They were talking about my friends and how they were imaginary but I proved them all wrong and finally proved my friends were real. But when I did, they all got surprised and stared and everyone but Papa looked a little scared. I don't know what's wrong but I've never seen Papa so angry or Momma so worried. I think they're probably just all being silly, but...I hope everything will be alright."

Hearing footsteps out in the hallway, Ellyn scrawled the last bit down quickly and closed the journal, hiding it under her pillow.

Momma opened the door, looking just as worried as before, but also looking...somewhat resigned. "Ellyn, dear, pack your things. We're leaving Fatier first thing tomorrow morning." She then shut the door again and was gone before her daughter could respond.

Ellyn's mouth dropped open. Moving? Leaving Fatier? Going away from what had been her home for her whole life?

Away from her friends?

No. No. No! They weren't going to take her friends away! Is that what Momma and Papa had been trying to do all along? Well, she wasn't going to let them! They had no right to do this to her! They didn't even ask...they didn't even care. They just wanted to control her and make her do what they wanted! They didn't care what she thought or felt so long as she did exactly what they told her. They weren't parents...they were tyrants!

Angrily, she grabbed a small pack from under her bed and started throwing things in it. She didn't have much: a couple changes of clothes, a hairbrush, a necklace, some pencils. She threw in her journal last, almost forgetting to put it in. Then she laid down on her bed, curled around the pack, fuming, plotting, and impatiently waiting for the night.


Ellyn woke with a jerk, realizing that she had fallen asleep and mentally berating herself. After laying still for just long enough to determine no sounds emitted from her parents' room, Ellyn carefully crawled out of bed. Shouldering her pack, she crept out of her bedroom, oh-so-carefully treaded down the hallway, and finally sneaked out the front door, casting one final glance at her home before slipping off in the faint moonlight.


As Ellyn climbed, she steadily calmed down, until her mind became curiously clear and quiet. Idly, she wondered why her friends were so silent right now. She would have to remember to ask.

The trip took just as long as it ever did. By the time Ellyn had reached the meeting ledge, the sun had already risen over the horizon, even if it choose to lurk behind a stray stormcloud. Maipin was already there, his hands in his pockets and his back leaned against a shadowy rock. He grinned at Ellyn as she ran over, uncharacteristically and awkwardly <font color=blue>mussing </font>her hair as she hugged him.

Ellyn glomped his leg and squeezed her eyes shut as tears of frustration and anger threatened to seep out. "My parents, they--" she began to explain.

"I know, we know..." Maipin replied. "It's okay. We'll help you." He smiled at her lopsidedly. "Your parents can't take you away from your friends," he said as he held out his hand invitingly.

The girl bit her lip and nodded, taking the offered hand before really thinking about what she was doing. It suddenly hit her like a wash of ice cold water. She was running away from home, running away from her parents -- certainly they were being unfair and cruel, but they were still...her family. She glanced behind her uncertainly, seeking out the small speck of her house...

And instead saw the fire.

"MOMMA! PAPA!" she yelled out, dropping Maipin's hand and running dangerously close to the edge of the mountain ledge. Maipin turned around quickly and scooped her up, perhaps preventing her from tumbling over the edge. Forgetting her previous endeavors to not let Maipin see her cry, Ellyn burst into tears. "Who would do that...why would anyone do that...Mister L'Holmet wouldn't...would he? Maipin...Maipin! My parents...!" Ellyn's voice subsided into hysterical sobbing. Maipin just held her as she cried, until she suddenly began struggling to break away. "I- I have to go see..."

Maipin pulled the girl back away from the edge. "You...can't. There's nothing we can do...they'll just hurt you, too..." he mumbled, voice low.

"But...but..." Ellyn suddenly shuddered, giving up on her struggles to turn around and hug Maipin tightly. "What can I do without my parents? Wi- without my family...."

Maipin sighed. "We'll...be your family now. We'll take care of you."

Ellyn gave no response. Before the sun creeped out from behind the clouds, Maipin scooped Ellyn up and began carrying her away. <p>
<span style="font-size:xx-small;">-=- "YOU SEE THE MIGHTY DAMARAMU'S BRAIN IS VERY COMPACT!" -- Damaramu
-=- "Don't worry Mink, I'll be good excess baggage!" -- Pia
-=- "But I'm a slime half!" -- Princess Vena
-=- "OH BY THE SEVEN GODS IT'S A MECHANICAL BIRD! But it's so...small..." -- announcer guy
-=- "Demons don't care about story continuity!" -- Doug Finn</span></p>

User avatar
pd Rydia
Posts: 5269
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Location: Temple of Fiends

Re: Oh no Dia is of ficcy trying?

Unread postby pd Rydia » Mon Jun 02, 2003 7:12 pm

And more...


<font color=blue>Ellyn wasn't sure how long Maipin carried her; it seemed like ages. All she remembered was darkness, tears, and at the end, suddenly looking up to see Decia and Ruel. They were standing outside the entrance to a cave.

She soon learned this was the entrance to her new home. It was lonely and isolated, but at least she had her three friends. Exploring soon revealed that outside the entrance was a deep forest; inside was a simple set of caverns. There was a kitchen, three bedrooms, and well-stocked library, all branching off a single hallway. Ellyn came to spend almost all her time in her room and the library.</font>

Days progressed into weeks, weeks passed into months, months faded into seasons, and seasons turned into years. Ellyn's new family, true to their word, did indeed take care of her; they raised her, fed her, and educated her.

At first, all her friends asked in return was that she study hard and learn well, and so she did. Ellyn excelled in her lessons, showing particular talent for illusion, malediction, and mental magics. In time, however, Ellyn began to more actively work for her keep -- she began running errands and doing chores for her family. <font color=blue>She delivered packages, ran messages, and once she got larger, protected her friends from enemies.</font> Slowly, she learned that they didn't take well to questions, so she eventually stopped asking them.

Because of these circumstances and Ellyn's complete and utter trust, it took her several, several years to realize that her "friends" were just using her.

'We need to destroy Melimn,' Ruel privately telepathed Maipin. Let the dragon do it.

Ellyn fumed. Their one mistake was teaching her mental magic so well. If it hadn't been for that, and their refusing to answer questions, and her inherent curiousity...she never would have started listening in on the drows' private conversations. She wouldn't have overheard that which they so desperately tried to hide.

'It might be tricky to convince her to do that...' Maipin replied.

'We've convinced her a trickier things.' Ruel's short, mental laugh was full of derisive mocking. He was mocking her.

Mocking her.

Ellyn growled faintly, shutting her eyes tightly in barely controlled rage. A toy. A tool. All this time, she had just been used. She shuddered to think of what some of the things she might have done by innocently carrying out Decia's "chores"...but it wasn't her fault she didn't know better. It was all the drows' fault...the way they manipulated her...the way they used her...and the way they laughed at her behind her back... Ellyn began to shake with fury.

Suddenly, she laughed once, and then began chuckling uncontrollably. They may have raised and trained her to be a powerful, destructive toy...no, they did...but that itself would be their own undoing. Because they trained her too well. They trained her too well!

There were no more voices in her head, only her own, because she had learned how to block out the drows' voices. It'd caused alarm at the time but she was no trouble so they feared no danger, the foolish, foolish bastards. She was no danger because she was a child and under control, but now was different. Now she was a danger, because she was a woman under her own control. She was a danger but they didn't know. They still thought she was controllable, they still thought she was their obedient toy...they still thought...

I AM NOT A TOY! Snarling, Ellyn gathered her hate and anger into a sphere of crackling black energy in her hand. She flinged it at the wall of her lair, watching rock shatter, little chunks flying everywhere. A shard embedded itself in her cheek, causing dark, deep green blood to trickle down her face. She growled and rubbed at the cut, smearing blood across her hand and face.

"Are you quite alright?" Decia's voice came from the doorway, full of sickeningly false concern. Ellyn had once been hypnotized, had once been fooled by that voice...but no longer. It was a voice full of grating, insidious deception.

"I'm...fine...I'm...just thinking about....my old neighbors. And what they did to my family...they angered me so..." Ellyn began to shake again. She was angry...she wanted to crush that fake concern off of Decia's face. All she wanted to do was that...

"Okay," Decia replied, smiling in what used to be a comforting manner. The woman turned away from Ellyn and walked down the hall.

'Ruel,' Ellyn heard her telepath. 'We need to talk about Ellyn...'

The dragon's eyes flew wide open. Did they already know? Had they found out? It wasn't safe here for her anymore, Ellyn mused darkly, and that cinched it. She needed to get away from here. She needed run away. Just like the last time she ran away...

Her entire frame was wracked by a full body shudder, before Ellyn crumpled to the floor and began sobbing.


Ellyn waited for dawn.

The irony of the situation set her nerves on edge. So many years ago, she'd been waiting with bated breath for the night to fall -- now she was desperate for the sun to rise. Daylight would be the best time, after all, to sneak away from the drow. They never did like the sunlight hours.

Waiting now was no more easier than it had been so many years ago. Was it dawn out yet? She nervously paced around to pass the time. How much longer should she wait?

Too much!

It was too much for her to handle, she couldn't wait any longer. She was going to go now.

She peered outside of the small cavern that passed for her room, trying to discern if anyone was moving around; it didn't seem so. Ellyn could sense no movement in the almost palpable darkness, and so she carefully slipped out of <font color=blue>the cavern that was her bedroom.</font>

She was now standing in <font color=blue>the hallway, a winding tunnel that led to the exit of the caverns. Further down the tunnel were entrances to the guest bedroom, where Ruel stayed during his occassional visits, and the bedroom where Decia and Maipin were now sleeping. </font>With a small, steadying, hissing breath, she began to creep cautiously along the twisting corridor.

She couldn't afford to be caught. No, no...she had to be very, very careful. She wanted to leave without the others noticing. She needed to escape without their interference. She was going to sneak away before they knew what was happening.

No mistakes...no mistakes... Ellyn repeated the phrase in her mind. She worked her way toward the exit slowly, placing one foot in front of the other carefully, alert for any noises or movement.

Nothing met her senses, and steadily, she kept moving along toward her goal. Her heart raced faster and faster the closer she got, until her blood was pounding in her ears so loudly as to drown out any other possible noises. In front of her was the the exit from her imprisonment, the entrance to the wide, free, open world. A few steps away was her freedom, a blurry patch of early morning grey framed by the darkness of cold stone.

Then, suddenly, a patch of the darkness framing the door moved. Maipin raised his head from his spot leaning against the mouth of the exit, blinking at Ellyn with brightly aware, red-orange eyes.

"Where are you going?" Maipin asked nonchalantly, acting as if nothing in the world was wrong. Ellyn barely heard him as the blood roared in her ears. How ridiculous of him...he couldn't pretend not to know...she could see the mocking in his eyes...

He stood up straighter, glancing at Ellyn with cold curiousity. "Ellyn...wh--"

Maipin's mask of polite inquiry faded into horror for the instant before the shadowball seared the flesh from his face; he didn't even have a chance to scream. Ellyn stared in fascination as Maipin's body stood upright for a split second, the exposed bone of his skull blackened and melted into a twisted expression of terrible agony. Minutes seemed to pass before the body slowly slumped forward, landing in a crumpled heap at Ellyn's feet.

The dragon stood rooted to her spot in shock. Despite the horror of Maipin's death, she felt a sweetly sick sense of of twisted triumph at what she'd just done. The feeling swelled until she couldn't help herself, the bubbling laughter pouring out of her mouth.

She laughed. She laughed with mirth at the sudden and unexpected agony of Maipin's death, she laughed at the shock, pain, and terror he must have experienced. She laughed in triumph at her final, blessed revenge. She laughed gleefully at the pain she'd inflicted, suddenly wishing she could have prolonged it. She should have prolonged it. After all, she'd suffered for years because of Maipin, and the others. His death was rewarding...but it wasn't enough.

"Ellyn! What happened?" Decia stood in the mouth of the tunnel, eyes wide. She saw Maipin's prone body, and glanced at Ellyn's expression...and the air around her shimmered slightly.

Ellyn grinned brightly at Decia, a sadistic glint shining in her eyes. "Hello!" she greeted cheerfully, beginning to laugh again. "How are you today?"

Decia visibly swallowed. "Ellyn, dear...what are you...what happened to Maipin...?" Her faded red eyes practically begged Ellyn to contradict the fears lurking in the drow woman's mind.

A sudden sneer broke the rythym of Ellyn's laughter, her face darkening and dashing any of Decia's hopes. Her expression turned murderous, her voice hateful. "He's dead, Decia, but you knew that. I killed him, but you knew that, too. I'm going to kill you, also. And...you know that...!"

Immediately, Ellyn formed another shadowball and threw it at Decia's face. The spell crackled as it hit a magical barrier around the drow, the energy of the shadowball dispersing as the barrier briefly flashed bright blue with strain. The power and rage behind Ellyn's spell was almost too much for the barrier to hold.

"Ellyn, stop this!" Decia's voice begged quietly from some far, distant location.

She batted away the voice as she focused on the furious flames of hatred within her heart. A little bit of the right concentration, and she was able to fan her rage into a roaring furnace of concentrated malevolence -- a source of raw, wrathful power. Her eyes snapped open widely as she stared at Decia in cold hate, focusing all the power in her possession to cast her spell...

And the barrier around Decia flared a brilliant cerulean color, holding against Ellyn's spell for only a half instant, before shattering completely. Decia shrieked as navy fire enveloped her body, trapping her within flames which ate at her body and soul. Ellyn simply watched curiously, enchanted by the beauty of the dark blue flames, and enraptured by the musical quality of Decia's horrible screams. She really did have a beautiful voice, after all. Decia stared in horror at Ellyn, mouth opening to scream the last word she would ever speak...


"No...no..." Ellyn shook her head. There was something wrong about Decia's last word being her name. It was wrong. She didn't like it. It should have been something else. No. No. NO!

Ellyn turned from Decia's screams of agony. She turned and ran from the caverns. She fled away from the cold, oppressive, darkened stone, and into the cool, welcoming forest.

The sun was just beginning to rise over the horizon. Light filtered through the forest's canopy, dimmed and tinted green from the leaves, lighting her path. The farther along she moved, the lighter her path became. The light almost hurt her eyes.

At first, she ran, but she eventually she had to stop. Gasping for air, Ellyn stopped to catch her breath, before forcing herself to resume walking, ignoring the fire in her lungs and legs.

She wasn't sure in what direction she was headed, she just knew she was headed away from those caverns. She forced her aching legs to keep carrying her away. Even after darkness fell in the forest, she kept walking, until, eventually, she collapsed. Ellyn had just enough energy to pull herself up against a hedge before she curled into a little ball and finally succumbed to sleep.


An indeterminant amount of time later, she jerked awake, eyes flying open wide. She had no idea what had woken her up...she had a faint, haunting feeling that some terrible spectre had chased her away from her dreams. It have chased her...it was hunting her...she shuddered and drew herself into a tigher ball, ignoring the complaints of her overworked muscles.

All her senses seemed to be alive and <font color=blue>dancing</font>. Crickets chirping and other owls hooting crashed against her ears, the smell of damp leaves assaulted her nose. She shifted slightly, but couldn't get comfortable...the feeling of the forest floor under her body and leaves brushing against the back of her neck suddenly made her choice of a resting spot an insufferably uncomfortable place. The coldness of the air made her skin prickle and crawl, and stabbed at her heart from the bottom of her lungs as she breathed it in. She snarled lightly and scrubbed frantically at her skin and face, trying to chase away the unnerving feelings.

She was so busy doing this that she almost didn't notice as the forest quieted. A slight snap as a twig broke in half made her jump up and whirl around, searching furiously for the source of the noise.

Ellyn growled. She couldn't see him, but she knew he was there.

"Come out, Ruel!" she spat. "Don't think I don't know you're there..." she added, suppressing a giggle.

It would be fun to watch him burn like the other two.

"I'm right here," Ruel's voice responded from Ellyn's right. She spun around to face him. He hadn't been there before...he was playing tricks already. He was always playing tricks.

It didn't surprise her, then, when her spell fizzled away to nothing around a magical barrier surrounding the drow.

Ruel's lip curled up in a faint sneer, and he opened his mouth to begin an offensive spell of his own. However, he didn't quite have the time to utter his incantation -- Ellyn was quicker than he was, and she had already formed an <font color=blue>icy javelin and sent it flying toward Ruel's head</font>. As her ice spell crashed against his barrier, he had to drop the offense and concentrate on maintaining his <font color=blue>defense</font>.

Ellyn knew no defensive spells herself, but she giggled as she remembered being told that the best defense was always a good offense. She hurled spell after spell at Ruel, laughing as the effort made her light-headed.

Ruel's voice came faintly, as if he were miles away. His voice was calm, as if he were completely unconcerned with Ellyn's spells, despite the fact he was obviously struggling with his single defensive spell. "You can't keep casting those spells forever," he uttered, looking Ellyn straight in the eye.

The dragon snarled in response. "You can't keep that barrier up...forever..."

"Ellyn, Ellyn..." a speck of concern creeped into Ruel's tone. "A truce...let's discuss this calmly...a partnership would benefit the both of us greatly...don't you agree?"

Ellyn briefly halted in her assault, the concern in Ruel's voice throwing her off. Decia's last scream echoed around in her head, distracting her from her surroundings, accusing her...but Decia couldn't have cared about her...that wasn't possible. And Ruel himself couldn't possibly...

She snapped to just as she felt a wave of magic wash over her body. Ruel stood looking pleased with himself, and he was now standing with his hands spread in a mockingly <font color=blue>conciliatory</font> manner. "Now," he said in a confident tone, walking towards Ellyn. "Let's talk..."

"NO!" Ellyn shrieked. She might have agreed to a truce...but Ruel had broken it...with some spell. Ruel looked utterly surprised as a blast of crackling shadow energy caught him in the chest and threw him backwards. He landed painfully on his back, and scrambled to his feet, just barely dodging out of the way of a second spell.

"Ellyn!" he snapped. "ELLYN! Listen to me! You NEED me! You need me to get rid of tha--"

A shard of ice <font color=blue>caught his side, shutting </font>him up quickly, but Ellyn wasn't really listening to him anyway. The blood roared in her ears, and her voices --HER voices, HER <font color=blue>thoughts</font>-- were now in complete control. Her veins raced with bloodlust, and her mind demanded Ruel's death. She must kill him. She had to kill him. He was a trespasser and he had to die...

She kept flinging spells at him, snarling as they missed or were blocked, crowing in triumph as each successful spell hit home. A small part of her mind screamed at her to stop, telling her that she was going to collapse from the drain soon...but she ignored that part entirely. She would rest -- right after she put Ruel to his final rest.

Ruel himself didn't seem so keen on dying. Burnt, bleeding, and broken, the drow finally managed to yell out a spell in between Ellyn's attacks...and just as she watched him turn around to flee, he disappeared from sight.

"NO!" Ellyn screamed. She began throwing spells all around, blasting the area where she'd seen Ruel last. As her spells disappated, connecting with nothing, she began spinning around in place, throwing spells in every direction around her. <font color=blue>She silently railed </font>at herself, berating her for letting her prey escape. She again ignored the small, quiet part of her mind that was telling her he was gone, and she needed to rest...her target wasn't dead, and so Ellyn kept tossing spells, hoping one might hit.

She continued casting and casting, until she couldn't cast any more. Her body unable to take any more punishment, Ellyn finally collapsed to the ground.


For the next several days, Ellyn traveled as far as she could, away from that place. The moss on the trees told her she was headed mostly north. She couldn't use the sun to figure out in which direction she was headed, because she stayed within the deeper forest; the sunlight hurt her eyes, while the darkness and the cover of the trees comforted her. Ellyn didn't really have a specific destination in mind to reach...she just knew she wanted to travel away.

She was very hungry. She scoured the local flora for edibles, scraping together just enough to barely survive; however, she was still hungry. Her stomach growled and churned, as if it were trying to eat itself. Finally, Ellyn decided to try to hunt. She didn't know how, but...she had to at least try.

The trees were too thick where she was currently walking, so she moved toward the edge of the forest, where the trees were thinner. The sunlight filtering through the sparse canopy made her squint as she located a small clearing to serve her purposes. Crouching down, she concentrated on a mental projection of her rarely-used dragon body, calling out to the magic innate in her that was necessary to revert to her natural form.

It would be good to stretch her wings again. She could almost feel the weight and pull of her wings on her back, even before she transformed. Thick muscle connected shoulders to her wings, which were themselves only delicate-looking constructions -- dragon wings consisted of strong bone and thick membrane. While her legs and arms were certainly sturdy, her wings were, easily, the largest and strongest of her limbs...after all, they had to support all of her dragon weight in flight. Throughout the years, Ellyn had found it it was comforting to even be able to imagine the weight of her wings against her back, and right now was no exception

Except she shouldn't be imagining it right now...she should be experiencing it.

Anxiously, Ellyn once again went through the procedure for transforming...it was a simple and natural chanelling of mana, that required little thinking and almost no conscious effort. It was a skill native to dragons. She couldn't understand, then, why she wasn't transforming -- panic began to creep into her tensed muscles as fear raced through her veins.

She tried again and again, but the result only remained the same. Why was it the same? She should be in dragon form right now, she wanted to be in dragon form, there was no reason why she shouldn't be able to transform. Again and again, she frantically retried to transform; her only reward was a tingling sense of mana coursing through her body. Foreign mana. Someone else's spell.

Ellyn felt like a icy cold hand slapped her in her face as she remembered the wash of magic that was Ruel's last spell against her. The color drained from her skin as all the warmth seeped from her body. She stood deathly still for a moment -- right before letting out a blood-curdling, dragonic screech that echoed for miles.

Like a terrified child, Ellyn began shaking. She crumpled forward in a heap, sobbing, shivering, and groaning, the world around her phasing out of her awareness. To her senses, all was black and nothingness.


How much time passed before she came to her senses once more, Ellyn had no idea. She did know, however, that she was already walking, curiously enough. So, when she became aware, she just...kept on walking.

<font color=blue>Walking and scavenging took up all the time in her day -- all the while her mind raced with dark, angry thoughts. When she finally caught up with Ruel...her tongue tip traced her lips, and she grinned fangily, imaging Ruel's lifeblood trickling down her arms from where she slit his neck.</font>

<font color=blue>She tried to keep to herself, wandering the forest, but </font>soon her hunger grew greater than her desire for isolation. She had to get more food...and in order to do that, she needed to find someone to help her. She certainly wasn't faring well on her own.

It was a simple trick locating a town -- the drow had taught her how to read the astral, to locate individuals and groups of people from a distance. Finding the nearest settlement was just a matter of looking for a large grouping of auras. She swiftly located such a grouping, and started her journey toward it.

She was nervous once she left the deep forest, but there were trees scattered about along her walk. If <font color=blue>trouble </font>arose, she figured, she could just scale a nearby tree and wait it out. Besides, she was lucky enough to run across a dirt path that apparently led toward her destination, and it was much easier on her feet to use the path over the forest floor. Her shoes were made of a soft material, and not very suited for traveling.

Surely the town she was approaching had some jobs she could work. The people of Fatier always had some odd jobs for people to do...someone would, certainly, take pity upon her plight, and help her by providing a job. It wasn't like she was asking for free food...she was willing to work. <font color=blue>She was willing to do anything to keep her alive until the day she exacted her revenge upon that drow...</font>

The strain of the sunlight on her eyes faded as the sun dipped down towards the horizon, casting an orange-pink hue over the sky. After hours of walking, Ellyn was faintly surprised to see a trio of figures outlined in the peach light along the path ahead of her.

She hurried toward the figures, calling out. They turned around and halted in their progress, staring back at Ellyn as she approached.

"Who are you?" The one in the center of the group asked. He stared at Ellyn, like she was the oddest thing in the world.

"I'm--" she barely caught herself from saying 'I'm Rai.' She shoved that thought aside with a shiver, and action which seemed to keenly interest the man on the left of the group. "E, Ellyn..." she murmured.

"Where do you come from?" demanded the original speaker. His eyes watched Ellyn coldly, appraising her.

"I'm from...Fatier..." she responded, too surprised at the interrogation to do anything but answer the questions shot at her.

"Fatier? Never heard o' it." This time, it was the man on the left who spoke up. He was watching Ellyn closely, the expression on his face making her want to shiver.

The man to the right of the group was the only one wearing anything close to a friendly expression. He, however, seemed to hang back, alternating his gaze from between his companions to Ellyn, while not speaking a word. Ellyn herself stuttered a bit before responding.

"Fatier...well, it's where I'm from...it's in the...south..."

"In Doma?" The first man raised his eye. "Those aren't Doman clothes...and they're rather ragged. Just how far did you travel--"

The third man finally spoke up, interrupting his friend's questioning. "You look hungry. Have you eaten at all in the last few days?"

"Well...no...that's why..."

The second man rolled his eyes, mouthing the word 'beggar,' while the first man snorted and eyed Ellyn dubiously. Ellyn nearly wilted on the spot, but the third man spoke up again, shooting a look at his companions. "That's why...what?"

"That's why I'm headed...for a town...to try to find a job to earn some money to buy food..."

The first man grinned broadly at this, nudging the second. "Really? Well, old Nofar and I could give you a job or two, paid for with a bit o' cash..."

The third man glared at the two, eyes narrowed. "I don't find that humorous, Falak."

Falak glared right back, but he shifted his weight around on his feet nervously. His eyes eventually dropped from the third man's unblinking gaze. "You never were one for a bit o' fun, Max," he half grumbled, half muttered.

Ellyn stood rooted to her spot, watching the interchange in fear. Somehow, she got the impression something beyond her comprehension had just occurred. She stood and watched in consternation as the men called Nofar and Falak turned around and began walking down the path again, not giving her a second glance.

While he cast a look over his shoulders at his companions, however, the third man didn't move immediately to follow them. Instead, he turned pale blue eyes toward Ellyn. "Don't mind them...they're just being themselves. But don't push your luck...I wouldn't be alone in a room with either of them, if I were you. You know what I mean."

Ellyn blinked wordlessly, not understanding at all. The man frowned at this, but stopped at the look of terrified dejection on Ellyn's face. "Come'n then...Ellyn, right? Tell you what..." He adopted a brisk, professional tone of voice. "Since you're so willing to find a job, and seem to be out of luck...I'll buy your meal and lodgings tonight, and help you find work in the morning. I'll be looking for work myself, so maybe we'll find something...

"Oh," he added as an afterthought, just before he turned around to head down the path. "I'm Alexander Maxilan, by the way." He bowed to Ellyn, standing up straight with a faint smile. "A mercenary for hire. Pleased to meet you, miss Ellyn." <p>
<span style="font-size:xx-small;">-=- "YOU SEE THE MIGHTY DAMARAMU'S BRAIN IS VERY COMPACT!" -- Damaramu
-=- "Don't worry Mink, I'll be good excess baggage!" -- Pia
-=- "But I'm a slime half!" -- Princess Vena
-=- "OH BY THE SEVEN GODS IT'S A MECHANICAL BIRD! But it's so...small..." -- announcer guy
-=- "Demons don't care about story continuity!" -- Doug Finn</span></p>

User avatar
pd Rydia
Posts: 5269
Joined: Mon Apr 22, 2002 4:12 pm
Location: Temple of Fiends

Re: Oh no Dia is of ficcy trying?

Unread postby pd Rydia » Sun Sep 21, 2003 5:33 pm

*bump* <p>
<small><center><font color=navy>Take these broken wings
And learn to fly again, learn to live so free
And when we hear the voices sing
The book of love will open up and let us in</font>

{RPGWW -- an RPing community} -- {Rydia's Pocket Dragon Encyclopedia} -- {StarDragon Oekaki}</small></center></p>

Uncle Pervy

Re: Oh no Dia is of ficcy trying?

Unread postby Uncle Pervy » Fri Sep 26, 2003 1:03 am

Too long didn't read.

Or rather, I skimmed it. Picked a bad time to do so, really. Overall, the changes seem to help it, but I'll need to give a more detailed read to be sure.

Greetings, large black person. Let us not forget to form a team up together and go into the country to inflict the pain of our karate feets on some ass of the giant lizard person.

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pd Rydia
Posts: 5269
Joined: Mon Apr 22, 2002 4:12 pm
Location: Temple of Fiends

Re: Oh no Dia is of ficcy trying?

Unread postby pd Rydia » Sun Nov 16, 2003 11:52 pm

:| <p>
-=- "Spammers are people too." -- SuperRube
-=- "And then the pixies of doom ate her brain. It was very tragic." -- White Knight
-=- "If it smells like a discussion, walks like a discussion, and talks like a discussion.. it's a.. duck" -- Crawling Reshiki<p><center>Image</center></p>


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