A new RPer and an attempt at a half-decent character

[TheLorax21]

I'm new to this board, but I tried to read around before I even attempted to make a character. I also decided not to try philsys the first time around, since it is slightly complicated.

I would appreciate any feedback and suggestions

Here it is...

Char Stats-
Name: Elyssa
Race: Human
Sex: Female
Age: Seventeen
Basic Visual Description:
&nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp Elyssa is about five one, around one hundred pounds. She’s slight in stature, but in top physical condition. Her skin is pale, her hair is cinnamon colored, straight and about shoulder length. Her eyes are a celery green. She normally dresses in pants or a long skirt. The skirts and pants she wears are usually black or navy, with a black or brightly colored tank top. She sometimes wears a cloak for warmth. She also carries a hand knitted messenger bag, black with a brilliant blue stripe, knitted by susanna.
Personality:
&nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp Elyssa is cheerful and outgoing, despite past life. She is a charmer, and puts people at ease, despite her profession. She is comfortable in social situations, despite her low upbringing. She does have a dark and irritable side, and tends to be especially testy when she receives romantic attentions.
Skills:
&nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp Elyssa posses those skills general associated with thieves. She can pick locks, is fairly skilled at hand to hand and knife fighting, can climb most surfaces, and can generally get about unseen. She’s very limber, as well as ambidextrous. She does have a few sewing skills picked up from her mother, but they aren’t very well developed.
Short History:&nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp
&nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp Elyssa is a child born of a rape to a poor seamstress in Port Sleipnir in Baron. She never knew her father, a sailor, being that he raped her mother and then sailed away on the next ship. She lived with Susanna, her mother, until she was fifteen. When Elyssa was fifteen, Susanna caught an often-deadly disease. She was too poor to pay for a doctor, so she died. Elyssa set out into the city to find work when she was done grieving for the one person in the world she cared for. She couldn’t find work anywhere, and joined up with a harbor gang to survive. She was rescued from the violent and abusive gang by a thief she knew as John. John taught Elyssa the tricks of his trade, and in doing so gave her a new life. However, he exploited her gratitutde, manipulating and sexually abusing her. Elyssa managed to wound him and escape, and now travels Gaera as a mercenary on her own.


Again, any feedback would be greatly appreciated

[FlamingDeth]

Not much to say here. Decent, plausible character and personality, decent, plausible background, no absurd magical powers or super death combat martial arts, or ultra-rare magical ancient artifacts...there's pretty much nothing wrong with this character, and should you ever want to port her to Philsys, it should be relatively easy to do so. Kudos. <p>
<hr width="70%"><center>Superion, Autobot air gestalt, recently died protecting Los Angeles from a nuclear missile. Rest in peace. :(</center></p>

[TheLorax21]

Thank you for the kudos. :)

I think I will try to convert Elyssa into a philsys character.
I'll post the philsys character sheet in this thread when I'm done with it.

[Vampire Jester Jinx]

Indeed. And welcome. <p><div style="text-align:center"></div></p>

[Capntastic]

For the most part, I like it! I would enjoy seeing this character used, I tell you truly.

[TheLorax21]

thank you!
*glows with pride/happiness*
I really appreciate the positive feedback.

[TheLorax21]

Ok, here's the philsys. I think i got it mostly right. Maybe.
Again, feedback is greatly appreciated

name: Elyssa
age: seventeen
eyes: green
hair: reddish brown
height: five foot one inch
Elyssa normally dresses in pants or a long skirt. The skirts and pants she wears are usually black or navy, with a black or brightly colored tank top. She sometimes wears a cloak for warmth. She also carries a hand knitted messenger bag to keep her stuff in which is black with a brilliant blue stripe, knitted by Susanna.(Her mother)


Background: Elyssa is a child born of a rape to a poor seamstress in Port Sleipnir in Baron. She never knew her father, a sailor, being that he raped her mother and then sailed away on the next ship. She lived with Susanna, her mother, until she was fifteen. When Elyssa was fifteen, Susanna caught an often-deadly disease. She was too poor to pay for a doctor, so she died. Elyssa set out into the city to find work when she was done grieving for the one person in the world she cared for. She couldn’t find work anywhere, and joined up with a harbor gang to survive. She was rescued from the violent and abusive gang by a thief she knew as John. John taught Elyssa the tricks of his trade, and in doing so gave her a new life. However, he exploited her gratitutde, manipulating and sexually abusing her. Elyssa managed to wound him and escape, and now travels Gaera as a mercenary on her own.


--Basics--
Name: Elyssa
RPer: TheLorax21
Race: human
Level: 1
XP: 0/1000
Max HP: 60
Max MP: 30
Max TP: 20
Initiative 3+3+2d6


--Attributes--
Courage +3
Wisdom +2
Intuition +4
Charisma +3
Agility +3
Dexterity +3
Strength +2
Stamina +1
Magic Aptitude: 0



Base AT/PA - 12/12
Modified for skill – 15/15
Modified for equipment - 16/13

-=- Elyssa usually carries a knife or two, as well as a few throwing knives-=-

Weapon Damage - knife (+1/-2)
Thrusting - 2+ 2 +1d6
Slashing- 4 + 4 +2d4
Chopping - 6 + 6 +2d6

Weapon Damage – throwing knife
Accuracy – 7
Damage – 10 + 1d4
Weight – 2.5


--Skills--
Lock picking - 3 <dex/dex/int>
Throwing knives – 3 <str/dex/cou>
Stealth – 4 <dex/agi/int>
Pickpocketing – 3 <cou/int/dex>
Find Traps – 2 <int/int/dex>
Escape Artist – 2 <dex/agi/int>
Unarmed – 2 <cha/cha/int>
Knife – 3 <cou/str/agi>
[S]Remain Unnoticed – 4
[S]Eavesdropping – 3
[S]Observant – 3
[K]Traps – 3
[K]Architecture – 2
[K]Mechanical Knowledge – 2
[K]Navigation – 1
[K]Ropes – 1
[K]Survival – 1


--Spells/Techs--


[stealth=2 pickpocketing =2] snatch (1TP) -
&nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp Elyssa can steal an item off a person. *question. Should there be some sort of die roll involved as to whether or not Elyssa is successful? If so, should I mention it here or somewhere else?*
[Stealth=3 Eavesdropping=2 Remain Unnoticed=3] reconnaissance (4TP) -
&nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp Elyssa can listen into conversations unseen, and gather information from said conversations.
[Throwing Knife=3] hard throw (6TP) -
&nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp Self Explanatory.
[Knife=2] stab (4TP) -
&nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp A fast hard stab, designed to put the victim in enough pain to give Elyssa an opportunity to slip away.
[Stealth=4 Lockpicking=2 Escape Artist=2] steal (8TP) -
&nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp Elyssa can enter a building, take an item, and leave again.
[Lockpicking=3] picklock (5TP) -
&nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp Elyssa can pick a lock. Success is Dex + Int * 3 < d20. If the result of the die is greater Elyssa’s dexterity plus three times her intuition, she fails to pick the lock.

[FlamingDeth]

The thing with pick pocketing, lock picking, and most of the other techs you have there is that you wouldn't need techs for those. In the instances where you use those, they're just normal skill checks. Techs tend to be things that go beyond the scope of normal skill checks, such as something that will enhance your PA or something for a few rounds, or something that'll let you dodge a spell rather than rely on MBlock, or something that lets you...I don't know, whittle twice as fast as normal.

Also, regardless of what the numbers for Int and Wis are, if there ar eno points in Mag, the character doesn't get MP. <p>
<hr width="70%"><center>Superion, Autobot air gestalt, recently died protecting Los Angeles from a nuclear missile. Rest in peace. :(</center></p>

[Uncle Pervy]

You should get some skills that aren't all adventuring stuff.

See, I'm fairly certain Elyssa has some hobbies, some things she does for fun or that aren't thieving. So Try to make your sheet reflect that a bit more. We tend to focus more on character interaction than the GM trying to kill you, so don't feel you have to make a character who can address every threat.

Also, snatch needs a Die Roll. And give how you describe it, it doesn't seem Snatch is very stealthy.


<p>
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NebbieQ: After all, nothing says romance like fighting the forces of Cobra and Druggies with a Rocket Launcher of 80s Justice.</p>

[Capntastic]

I concur. I can imagine her having say, ranks in dancing or conversation, but those are merely suggestions. A well balanced character, in terms of combat and non-combat is the bestest to play. Makes interaction fun, as well.

[TheLorax21]

Thank you for the suggestions. I'll do some editing, and re-post the sheet when I'm done.

[JoshuaDurron]

From the strictly numbers point of view, which is what they keep me around here for, I see nothing wrong, except for one thing.

It looks like you've added her ranks in knife use to both sides of the AT/PA modifiers. (12+3/12+3=15/15) Sadly, that's not how it works. Rather, you can choose to devote a point to AT to raise it by one, or devote a point to PA, to raise that by one. You don't have to add your points evenly to both sides, or any such thing. You may add 3 to AT, for 15/12, 3 to PA for 12/15, 1 to AT, 2 to PA for 13/14, ect. But you may only increase your AT/PA numbers by 3 total. Currently, you are increasing your numbers by 6 total.

I sincerely hope that made sense. ; <p>

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"Crazy is good." - Luffy, One Piece
</p>

[TheLorax21]

new and improved-ish? I added some social skills, and corrected the MP. I also made Elyssa slightly less of a fighter, because you guys were right, it doesn't fit very well.


name: Elyssa
age: seventeen
eyes: green
hair: reddish brown
height: five foot one inch
Elyssa normally dresses in pants or a long skirt. The skirts and pants she wears are usually black or navy, with a black or brightly colored tank top. She sometimes wears a cloak for warmth. She also carries a hand knitted messenger bag to keep her stuff in which is black with a brilliant blue stripe, knitted by Susanna.(Her mother)


Background: Elyssa is a child born of a rape to a poor seamstress in Port Sleipnir in Baron. She never knew her father, a sailor, being that he raped her mother and then sailed away on the next ship. She lived with Susanna, her mother, until she was fifteen. When Elyssa was fifteen, Susanna caught an often-deadly disease. She was too poor to pay for a doctor, so she died. Elyssa set out into the city to find work when she was done grieving for the one person in the world she cared for. She couldn’t find work anywhere, and joined up with a harbor gang to survive. She was rescued from the violent and abusive gang by a thief she knew as John. John taught Elyssa the tricks of his trade, and in doing so gave her a new life. However, he exploited her gratitutde, manipulating and sexually abusing her. Elyssa managed to wound him and escape, and now travels Gaera as a mercenary on her own. Elyssa likes learning new things, and often looks for new experiences when she travels.


--Basics--
Name: Elyssa
RPer: TheLorax21
Race: human
Level: 1
XP: 0/1000
Max HP: 60
Max MP: 0
Max TP: 20
Initiative 3+3+2d6


--Attributes--
Courage +3
Wisdom +2
Intuition +4
Charisma +3
Agility +3
Dexterity +3
Strength +2
Stamina +1
Magic Aptitude: 0



Base AT/PA - 12/12
Modified for skill – 13/13
Modified for equipment - 14/11

-=- Elyssa usually carries a knife or two, used mainly for defense. She prefers not to fight if she can avoid it -=-

Weapon Damage - knife (+1/-2)
Thrusting - 2+ 2 +1d6
Slashing- 4 + 4 +2d4
Chopping - 6 + 6 +2d6


--Skills--
Lock picking - 3 <dex/dex/int>
Stealth – 3 <dex/agi/int>
Pickpocketing – 3 <cou/int/dex>
Etiquette – 2 <cou/cha/int>
Guitar – 2 <cha/cha/dex>
Bartering – 1 <cha/cha/int>
Cooking – 2 <int/int/dex>
Find Traps – 2 <int/int/dex>
Escape Artist – 2 <dex/agi/int>
Unarmed – 1 <cha/cha/int>
Knife – 2 <cou/str/agi>
[S]Remain Unnoticed – 3
[S]Eavesdropping – 3
[S]Observant – 2
[S]Musical Talent – 2
[K]Geography – 2
[K]Cooking – 1
[K]Diplomacy – 2
[K]History – 1
[K]Etiquette – 2



--Spells/Techs--

[Lockpicking=3] picklock (5TP) -
                Elyssa can pick a lock. Success is Dex + Int * 3 < d20. If the result of the die is greater than Elyssa’s dexterity plus three times her intuition, she fails to pick the lock.

Ok…now I’m slightly confused. I did some looking around at a few other character sheets and it looked to me like most of the techs had to do with magic. What sort of techs would go with a character like Elyssa?


Edited by: [url=http://p068.ezboard.com/brpgww60462.showUserPublicProfile?gid=thelorax21>TheLorax21</A] at: 5/13/04 10:04 pm

[Uncle Pervy]

Not bad, save for Lorr's note that you don't add weapon ranks to both PA and AT.

As for Techs... Well, there are a variety of them. Spells are a major part of any mage's tech list. There are also direct attack techs, which let one attack something for more damage. There ar what we call stances; which let a character sacrifice TP, MP, or HP (Whatever is realistically appropriate) to shift one's stats, such as lowering AT to Increase PA. Others may be used to inflict some sort of non-damaging but still annoying condition upon a foe, such as making him or her lose a turn.

A lot of techs are combat based, but not all of them are. They can just as easily affect things out of combat as they can inside. For example, one of my characters has a tech that allows her to sing with a rank greatly increased from her actual one in exchange for a significant amount of TP.

HOWEVER.

You don't need to have a lot of techs. Some characters do, some don't. It all depends on what is IC. One of my favorite characters one has a one or two, despite his level. <p>
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NebbieQ: After all, nothing says romance like fighting the forces of Cobra and Druggies with a Rocket Launcher of 80s Justice.</p>

[TheLorax21]

Thank you all for the help/suggestions.

Lorr, you note did make sense. I think. If I got it wrong, then it didn't. I went back and corrected the sheet in the most recent post, rather than re-post the long blurb just to change something that small.

I'll think some more on the techs.

:)

[JoshuaDurron]

Horaj! I can communicate in a clear and reasonable fashion! =D

Also, on the issue of techs: Pervy is completely and entirely correct. Techs are not hugely important to all characters. I have a character who is on level 2, and has only four of them. I've also seen characters on level 1 who have 20 (not recommended, by the by...)

In short, if a character is RPed right, they might not even need techs (although they are fun.) It's based purely on my intuition, but I think you'd be the kind of person who has that kind of skill. (Now don't get a big head, I've been wrong before.) If you want a rule of thumb for giving your characters techs, just give them abilities that will help them do what they do normally, only better. <p>

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"Crazy is good." - Luffy, One Piece
</p>

[TheLorax21]

thank you. I'll watch the size of my head carefully :)

Also, just one more thank you for everyone who gave me advice or a suggestion. <p>one can be loved without knowing it, but one cannot love without knowing it - Aristotle, Eudemian Ethics</p>