doll master magician

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ziratha
 

doll master magician

Unread postby ziratha » Mon Oct 25, 2004 3:46 pm

Richard Solomon was born 34 years ago In a traveling band. Richard learned 'magic'/slight of hand from the members of the band. He travelled with the band for a few years until he was 19 when He took off on his own to see what he could see.

He has been travelling by himself since then, entertaining those he could to earn a few coins here and there. Later, at the age of 24 he learned of the art of doll magic, At first he could only make dolls look like people but that soon grew.

Richard is somewhat untrustworthy. 3 years ago, thats the first time he stole, or more specifically he used his dolls to steal. He was in the city of doma, selling his dolls. A rich noble-woman came by who was thrilled by the dolls, but was very rude to him anyway. She eventually wanted to buy one for her daughter but refused to pay even half the normal cost. So he had an idea, "Wait till they are sleeping 3 nights from now, take the jeweled necklace she is wearing. Bring it here, at midnight." he whispered to the doll.

As he took the necklace from the doll at the appointed time, He thought, 'that was easy, but who would suspect a doll?'. His income increased significantly after that. He would steal from the wealthy, those who could afford it, then move on. By the time the people noticed the theft, the dolls would be back at the house, to play with the children, follow like a puppy dog, or even just sit being cute. After all who would suspect a little version of themself? He let three days later, His guilty conscience wouldn't leave him alone until he did.

Richard is rather quiet to others, he has to speak to perform but is otherwise more likely to look at you than speak to you. Secretly he dislikes strangers, but values friends highly, when one moves as much as he does friends are few and far between.

The abilities he have almost scare him, not because hes powerful in any way, but because he makes life. Surly this is some sort of sin. He only continues because he has nothing else he can do.

He loves and hates be a traveler, he wishes that he could settle down. The longest he stayed in a city was in doma, for the 1 year he was there, he ruined it by stealing, stealing from a woman who probably doesn't even remember he exists.

Fate's pawn, thats what he thinks of himself. He regualarly reads tarot cards, and has a nack for his predictions coming true...

He has no real strengh of his own, his only power is to enhance or copy the strenth of others.

His abilaties to make friends come almost exclusively from his abilities with dolls. As a performer he is able to be friendly without being friends... When he makes friends he tends to value them much higher than the average person, as he makes them less often than other people.

Stats
Courage – 2
Wisdom – 5
Intuition – 3
Charisma – 2
Agility – 1
Dexterity – 2
Strength – 1
Stamina – 2
Magic Aptitude – 3

skills
36 points
[k]Cooking 2
[k]Mathematics 3
[k]School of Magic Techniques 3
[s]Acrobatics - [url=http://p068.ezboard.com/brpgww60462.showUserPublicProfile?gid=ziratha@rpgww60462>ziratha</A:] at: 10/31/04 10:47 am
[/i]

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Shinigori V2
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Re: doll master magician

Unread postby Shinigori V2 » Mon Oct 25, 2004 4:07 pm

Um.

No. <p>
<div style="text-align:center">Image</div>
<div style="text-align:center">M-m-mist f-form!</div></p>

Banjooie
 
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Re: doll master magician

Unread postby Banjooie » Mon Oct 25, 2004 4:20 pm

Courage – 1
Wisdom – 6
Intuition – 6
Charisma – 2
Agility – 1
Dexterity – 3
Strength – -1
Stamina – 1
Magic Aptitude – 3


Bessie: Moo. (You're still a dirty twink.) <p><Chat> <Matto says, "What's up?"
<Chat> <Prince_Herb says, "Angst."
<Chat> <Prince_Herb says, "Drama."
<Chat> <Prince_Herb says, "Betrayal."
<Chat> <Prince_Herb says, "Plushies."</p>

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NebulaQueen
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Re: doll master magician

Unread postby NebulaQueen » Mon Oct 25, 2004 4:55 pm

So...what's this Doll Magic, exactly? <p>

*Megaman sounds like a little girl*-Uncle Pervy, on the Voice Acting in MM8

"Well, we've made it to Leeds without being robbed or violated. We win at time traveling!" - Shelley, Scary-Go-Round</p>

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pd Rydia
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Re: doll master magician

Unread postby pd Rydia » Mon Oct 25, 2004 4:58 pm

http://p207.ezboard.com/brpbootcamp <p>
<center><small>"We are just poor, wandering corn farmers..."
</p>

Mechanisto
 
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Re: doll master magician

Unread postby Mechanisto » Mon Oct 25, 2004 10:22 pm

Sending an awful lot of new arrivals to the camps lately.

Hm.

Out of curiosity, how would I go about practicing my GMing ability over in yonder forum? None of the rp's I start seem to go anywhere. <p>---
My head moves around inside the bag, it's not like I'm drinking through my actual eye socket.</p>

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pd Rydia
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Re: doll master magician

Unread postby pd Rydia » Tue Oct 26, 2004 12:00 am

Nope, just him and another one.

We made it, might as well use it. <p>
<center><small>"We are just poor, wandering corn farmers..."
</p>

ziratha
 

Will

Unread postby ziratha » Sat Oct 30, 2004 10:14 am

Will somebody give me some ideas on how to fix this character, if it's so bad? Just saying it sucks doesn't help. Help me out.
I've done research for this character and everything. So i intend to try to make this charcter work if at all possible.


The Great Nevareh
 

Re: Will

Unread postby The Great Nevareh » Sat Oct 30, 2004 3:06 pm

Some people need to realize that this isn't a spam forum where we can sit around and lord over RPGWW's specific incarnation of RP.

Your character is interesting, yes. Mechanically, it does check out- people just might have a problem with your being able to be a puppetmaster (literally) over an entire legion of dolls.
About the thefts- In Doma City, they might suspect thin air of stealing their valuables, and they might notice if, every time someone buys one of your dolls, *something* valuable disappears.

The main thing that people are probably balking at isn't your design, but your writing style (which is absolutely the wrong thing to complain over). Try using more sentence and word variation as well as HITTING SHINI WITH A LARGE METAL BAT and you might gain some more acceptance. <p>[---------------------------]
"There is great disorder under Heaven, and the situation is excellent."
-Mao Tse-Tung</p>

ziratha
 

Re: Will

Unread postby ziratha » Sat Oct 30, 2004 5:14 pm

Thanks for the encouragment, My character, wouldn't be able to have a legion of dolls, as he can only have one attacking doll at a time. He could theoretically have many non-attacking dolls but they wouldn't be useful.
As for the thefts, he didn't do it all the time, only now and then when he needed to make ends meet. For the most part dolls didn't steal, he just would now and then when a particularly rich or rude person came by.


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pd Rydia
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Re: Will

Unread postby pd Rydia » Sat Oct 30, 2004 7:01 pm

Neverah needs to notice when posts are edited! Also, to suggest that writing well is not important for this community is really dum(TM).

However, it would seem that would not be your problem completely, Zir--you do well enough toward the end. Just at the beginning, you have a lot of short, choppy sentences. It's a bit strange, but nothing a little editing some time, at your leisure, won't fix. However, I do suggest putting in some line breaks between paragraphs. Those are neato.

Also, Neverah is correct about the character--this is much, MUCH better than "no major background." Seems to mostly work for me. A few questions, though: how does he make friends if he dislikes strangers? And how will you involve him with other characters if he's so taciturn? As for anything else, I don't see why you couldn't flesh it out as you RP him, as your originally planned.



As for PS stuff--you appear to have 6 more skill points to use--knowledge and supplementary skills are half-cost, at character creation and level-up. (Someone check my math on this?) I suggest considering investing those into as many current skills as would be in character, considering that a rank 1 in a skill is virtually not knowing the skill at all.

Also also!

-=- Non magic magic - <Dex/Agi/Int> 1 (pulling rabbits out of hats etc) -- might I suggest the name "stage magic"?

-=- [k]Tarot card reading/magic 4 -- If this involves any actual magic, then it needs to be a regular skill. If it's just reading tarot cards, arguably with no actual future-telling, then it can be a knowledge skill.

-=- As for the dolls, perhaps a limit on how many of them can be "alive" at a time? To cut back on the potential godmodeyness? To come up with this, perhaps you can come up with a reason for how they animate/come alive--whether it's actually Richard doing it, or some other meddling force. You do not have to share this, and you could get another RPer or two to conspire with you, if you'd like it to not completely stay in your hands. <p>
<center><small>"We are just poor, wandering corn farmers..."
</p>

Mechanisto
 
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Re: Will

Unread postby Mechanisto » Sat Oct 30, 2004 7:35 pm

Quote:
-=- Non magic magic - 1 (pulling rabbits out of hats etc) -- might I suggest the name "stage magic"?


Seems to me this should be two skills. "Sleight Of Hand", and "Performance."

It means you have to spend more skill points, but then I personally think Sleight of Hand is always worth the investment. Image <p>---
My head moves around inside the bag, it's not like I'm drinking through my actual eye socket.</p>

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pd Rydia
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Re: Will

Unread postby pd Rydia » Sat Oct 30, 2004 7:39 pm

Yeah, I think Mech's got the better idea. Could always use real magic in "Stage Magic"... <p>
<center><small>"We are just poor, wandering corn farmers..."
</p>

ziratha
 

Re: Will

Unread postby ziratha » Sat Oct 30, 2004 10:18 pm

well, i edited the character based on your suggestions. Keep em coming.


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pd Rydia
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Re: doll master magician

Unread postby pd Rydia » Sun Oct 31, 2004 2:06 am

If I'm not mistaken, you still seem to have oooone skill point left to use; that could be one skill point in a regular skill, or two total skill points in [k] or [s] skills, since they are half cost. I can't say anything much about the skills, I'm not that good balancing those, but I think someone such as Shaun, Jak, Idran, should check over those.

A note about the MP potions--those are really expensive--about 150 gil ($75) a piece for a weak one (10+1d10, or 11-20 MP recovery) or 450 gil ($225) a piece for a medium one (30+1d10, or 31-40 MP of recovery). If he carries that much on him, he's going to have to hide it--also, it's a bit twinky to have that many mana potions on hand, even if it's in character. Also, if someone finds out he has that many, he he could a target for other thieves.

Some things to keep in mind--he might want to not steal from everyone he sells a doll to, for one thing--I don't think you plan on that, of course, but just a note. Also, he might want to try for there to be many other things in common between his victims, if he can manage--to avoid the problem of people figuring out, "Hey, you know...the people who get stolen from all bought dolls from this dude, and there's nothing else much they have in common..."

I'm still a bit confused about how he makes friends. They admire his dolls, and they get to talking? He takes an interest in those who take an interest in his dolls? And aren't an ass about it, that is.

There's some grammatical stuff in the background, but I can get to it later--I'll note specifics if you like, if you don't want to hunt them out yourself. Overall, it's muchly improved. Just a bit of capitalization, a few missing commas, and such--technicalities for the most part. <p>
<center><small>"We are just poor, wandering corn farmers..."
</p>

SALSAlys
 

Re: doll master magician

Unread postby SALSAlys » Sun Oct 31, 2004 2:25 am

Nice improvement. ^_^

And no, I have nothing else of substance to say. =D;


ziratha
 

thanks,

Unread postby ziratha » Sun Oct 31, 2004 9:34 am

Im glad that its improved, ill look over history and try to find some of the graamatical errors. Grammer is not my strongest subject... but I'll try.

I'm still trying to balance the skills out, thankfully i found a char sheet with tarot magic. So that'll help immensly...



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