new character idea..

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darkknight61189
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new character idea..

Unread postby darkknight61189 » Sat Feb 14, 2004 5:29 pm

yeah, i thought i might make another character, jusst cuz i have the time to do it..

Name: Gond Lorcast
Species: Human
Height: 5' 7"
Weight: 182 lbs.
Eye color:blue
Hair: Black with yellow spikes
Age: 31


Background information: A former Knight, he is now a wanderer, banished from his original home. He used to live in New Kilian, but was banished after being accused of murdering one of the villagers. In actuality, he had been defending the girl from a demon that had arbitrarily attacked the girl. He lost his left arm in the fight, and lost his self-esteem as well. After being banished, everyone knew about him, and he was not allowed anywhere. He decided to change his physical features, growing his hair long and dyeing a few strands of hair yellow, which stuck up. His former wepaon of choice had been a broadsword, which he kept with him at all times, but after the banishment, they took away the blade, which had been his father's. After that, he picked up a naginata, which he liked more. He works mainly as a mercenary, killing and doing things for other people, because he believes that if he can not be happy as a Knight, then he can at least allow others to be happy.

Weapons: Naginata- has rings attached to the blade, which make a lot of noise when swung, attempting to confuse the enemy.
&nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp Throwing axes- only for long-range attack, but he rarely ever uses them.
&nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp Gauntlets- his strength is incredible, and his gauntleted hands are a wepaon all in themselves

Armor: He wears a knight's armor, although the coat of arms has been taken away from him. The armor was passed to him by his father, who died in a war before he had been born. the armor is very light and unrestricting of motion. The top half is golden, while the lower half is silver.

Fighting Style: He fights very recklessly, because he doesnt really care about his life. He is very strong, mainly because he only has his right hand, so he weilds the naginata with only one hand. He fights with very deliberate motions, putting his weight into every swing.

Other Information: Gond is a knight, always fighting for what he believes to be right. He is willing to put his life on the line for anyone. He does not have very good self esteem, and believes that he does not deserve to live. he is loyal and trustworthy, although reckless as well.

Techniques: Cure- he has been taught to be able to heal himself and others in the heat of battle.
Raging slash- Gond uses this when he is made, the slash causes more damage, but is very inaccurate, and he is left open or attack if he misses.
Earthquake chop- Gond smashs his fist into the ground, causing a little earthquake that can really shake the enemy up, then while the enemy is dazed, he slashes at them with his naginata


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Endesu
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Re: new character idea..

Unread postby Endesu » Sat Feb 14, 2004 6:30 pm

Wrong forum. <p>
[url=http://www.fileplanet.com/dl.aspx?/planetdreamcast/sonic/music/sonic_adventure01/06_open_your_heart.mp3]Now I see what I've gotta do /
Open Your Heart /
And you will see[/url]</p>

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PriamNevhausten
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Re: new character idea..

Unread postby PriamNevhausten » Sat Feb 14, 2004 6:38 pm

Fixed. <p><span style="font-size:xx-small;">"It's in the air, in the headlines in the newspapers, in the blurry images on television. It is a secret you have yet to grasp, although the first syllable has been spoken in a dream you cannot quite recall." --Unknown Armies</span></p>

EKDS5k
 

Re: new character idea..

Unread postby EKDS5k » Sat Feb 14, 2004 6:46 pm

This isn't really a new character. The "shamed knight with no direction or self esteem" has been done to death. You just gave him one arm, but you didn't even pull that off right.

And now, specific flaws:

1. Have you ever actually stopped and considered how incredibly idiotic black hair with yellow spikes would look?

2. Gold and silver make for horrible materials to make armour out of. Unless you mean they're plated with gold and silver, which is idiotic because it would wear off in like a month of the armour seeing combat.

3. If he only has one arm, and he's holding a naginata in it, how would he use his "gauntleted hands [sic]" as a weapon? As well, why would he even have a Japanese weapon if he's essentially European in design?

4. Speaking of the naginata, do you realise how impossible it would be to wield it in one hand, despite having great strength? They're not like swords where with enough strength you can wield a two handed one in one hand. To effectively use a naginata you have to be able to change the position of your grip, something you can't do with only one hand. All you'd have to do would be stand within three feet of the guy and he'd be wholly unable to strike you with either of the bladed ends.

5. You mention that he's quite strong, and can apparently cause small earthquakes by punching the ground. But he weighs 180 pounds. Hell, that's only slightly more than I do, and I'm fairly thin.


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pd Rydia
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Re: new character idea..

Unread postby pd Rydia » Sat Feb 14, 2004 8:44 pm

I don't think New Kilian has any humans in it. Nor are there demons common there.

It's also a very, very isolated and tiny country, which most Igalans don't know exist, so people wouldn't all recognize him based on what he looks like and what he did in there. <p>
<center>Hello, I'm Dia. I'm a dragongirl, and I bite. RAWR!
</center><small>-=- "I wanna get so drunk that I start seeing my friends as cows." -- Aya (LadyDragonClawsEDW)
-=- "If you're still able to see in colors and not in scents...you're CERTAINLY not drunk enough." -- Nakibe (Nakibe)
-=- "Don't you know the only excuse for that is being drunk!?" -- Hakaril (Archmage144)
-=- "Alcohol is good for everything." -- Banjooie</small></p>Edited by: pd Rydia&nbsp; Image at: 2/14/04 8:46 pm

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NebulaQueen
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Re: new character idea..

Unread postby NebulaQueen » Sat Feb 14, 2004 9:41 pm

1) The fact about defending a girl from a demon being turned into an accusation for murder seems a bit shaky. For one thing, it seems that the evidence would be more in favor for the knight, unless there were circumstances that weren't mentioned. Also, why not any other punishment? Why not being put in jail, or even being put to death, if he was found guilty of murder?

Suggestions: Instead of being accused of murder directly, how about him resigning from his post, so to speak? Various rumors mar his reputation, and the best course of action he sees is to leave before he's forced out.

2) He's too angsty. The main basis of his personality seems to be depression and possible suicidal tendencies...not very three dimensional. It's also incredibly stereotypical, with no unique bents to it to balance him out.

Suggestions: Instead of focusing on the tragedy of his past, try building up his personality. For example, while the events of his past sadden him, he tries not to show it because he thinks that it's selfish. As a result, he tries to do selfless acts to bring some meaning to his life...trying to find his happiness through the happiness of others. While his past is a major influence, he's also trying to get on with a new life.


End result: He isn't a complete angstball ("oh woe is me I think I'll step in front of this fastly moving cairrage-misery, thy blackened whore, I leave thee once and for-*SPLORTCH*"), he has at least something to live for.

3) Yeah...gonna have to agree with Doc and say that gold and silver = not good choices for armor. For example, pure gold is incredibly soft, so the vast majority of gold jewelry are actually alloys, with other metals added in to make the gold stronger and more durable.

Suggestions: Choose a more practical metal for his armor, with perhaps some gold or silver adornments.

Aaand...that's it. Main focus: Work on personality a bit more, kay? <p>

<span style="font-size:xx-small;">
"Hello, I'm Troy Mclure! You may remember me from such realms as Hell, and Gaera!"-Shinigori, OOC</span></p>

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darkknight61189
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Re: new character idea..

Unread postby darkknight61189 » Sun Feb 15, 2004 9:20 am

Hm... you all have very valid points. Personality should get a fix up, and i just picked New Kilian because I really didnt have anywhere else. I just kind of looked at the map and picked a random spot. if you have any suggestions, it would help. Also, I see your point that his past is a little shaky as well. Hm, I guess I'll just have to rework him. Thanks for the help.


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NebulaQueen
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Re: new character idea..

Unread postby NebulaQueen » Sun Feb 15, 2004 2:01 pm

Picking random spots is a bad, bad idea for character backstory if you don't know anything about the spot you picked. Why don't you look through the nation backstories in the Gaera Guide and pick the one that seems most fitting? <p>

<span style="font-size:xx-small;">
"Hello, I'm Troy Mclure! You may remember me from such realms as Hell, and Gaera!"-Shinigori, OOC</span></p>

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Re: new character idea..

Unread postby Banjooie » Tue Feb 17, 2004 3:06 am

At least he doesn't invent things on the spur on the moment to help out the team. <p><Chat> <Matto says, "What's up?"
<Chat> <Prince_Herb says, "Angst."
<Chat> <Prince_Herb says, "Drama."
<Chat> <Prince_Herb says, "Betrayal."
<Chat> <Prince_Herb says, "Plushies."</p>

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darkknight61189
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Re: new character idea..

Unread postby darkknight61189 » Tue Mar 09, 2004 7:13 pm

Ok, I'm going to reuse this thread to ask a question for one of my character's Philsys sheets. I've got a character I've been thinking up. She's a feral, half human, half feline. The thing is, she doesn't have opposable thumbs. Now, to get around this she uses her tail to grab things. Also, one of her attacks utilizes the retractable claws in her hands and her tail, which would be holding a dagger. Now, according to Spleen, there are no characters that use three weapons at the same time that he knows of. So, now, I'm wondering, is there something I would need to say as a skill in Philsys that would allow me to attack with my tail? Or with three weapons?


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Re: new character idea..

Unread postby Lord McBastard » Tue Mar 09, 2004 7:40 pm

Let me........bring up logic for this character as well.

First off, cats do not have prehensile tails. A monkey does, but not even they can hold something with enough dexterity to be used in combat. Nor could they swing it with any force.

Without opposable thumbs holding an object isn't nearly as easy. Swinging it around? There's a good chance you'll hit something and you'll lose your grip and stabbing is much worse. Changing your grip would be very difficult if not impossible.

How exactly would you attack with a tail? It would have to be four to five feet long to reach around you to strike. You could turn around and attack with it, in which case you've just exposed yourself to being attacked in the back. Great plan, stapleface. <p><div style="text-align:center">
"Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wagh'nagl fhtagn"-Call of Cthulhu</div>
<div style="text-align:center">"Go tell your alien brothers, that Ronnie Cordova says they're gay!"-Ronnie Cordova</div></p>

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darkknight61189
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Re: new character idea..

Unread postby darkknight61189 » Tue Mar 09, 2004 8:42 pm

Right, you've got a good point, and without opposable thumbs you can't hold anything, period. And I see your point about how cats can't quite grab onto things with their tails. Still, my idea for attacking with her tail is like only when she needs to, fending off more than one person at a time, or attacking someone who has come up behind her.


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Re: new character idea..

Unread postby FlamingDeth » Wed Mar 10, 2004 3:12 am

Only when she needs to do what? Hurt herself really badly? <p>Image</p>

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.

Unread postby Banjooie » Wed Mar 10, 2004 1:19 pm

OH SNAP



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