OMG new literary effort from Shini? Hoorj! :(
From the journal of Cervant L. Amanziani, Daughter of Frederick W. Amanziani, former Grand General of Barius-
Reshtara 12, 1300
Dear Dairy-
I'm afriad I don't quite know how to best start this, though Father said that I write in this book as if I where writing to a friend, and all friends know eachother's names, right? I'm Cervant Lyone Amanziani, and I'm currently 7 years old, and I live in Barius, in the City of Storms with my father and brother. I'm writing here because Father asked me to- He said it would help me 'come out of my shell', whatever that means. I think he's referring to my not having many friends. I don't think he knows how hard it is when half of the people I know make fun of me, and I'm afraid to speak to the other half- They might make fun of my stutter. I don't see why he doesn't concern himself with Griff as much as he does me- Griff hardly ever says a word to anyone, and when he does speak, it's often harsh and rude...I love him, I love them both, deeply, but...Well, sometimes Griff scares me. He's too quiet. As if he's trying to hide something. And Father is too busy worrying about me to notice. Griff said once that I remind Father of Mother....
...Mother. I wish I knew her. She died the day I was born, I never so much as got to see her face. Father says I look just like her, but I'd still have liked to know what she really looked like. I suppose that that's why he worries so much about me- I look just like Mother did. Well, my hand is begining to ache, and my candle is dying, so I suppose I should stop now. Good night, diary.
Reshtara 15th, 1300
Dear Diary-
I feel awful. No, worse then awful. I don't think that there even is a word for how bad I feel right now. I suppose it may help to write a bit about what happened, but...I'm not sure if I really want to...Oh well. I suppose I should just suck it up and write about it anyway, if nothing else than to vent emotions. Griff got in a fight today. A fight with a bigger boy- Two, actually- and got badly hurt. And it's all my fault.
You see, I mentioned being made fun of in my last entry because of my stutter. I can't help it. It just happens. But I let it get to me more than I should, so I get teased about it alot. Today was a bad day for that- Alot of the other children at the academy where teasing me. Then the boys came- I think their names where Ivan and Antony- and began on me...I began to cry. I couldn't hold it any longer. One of Griffs friends, maybe Miguel (I had seen him in the group earlier- Not teasing, simply observing) must have told him, because he ran from nowhere and punched the bigger one- Ivan, I think- in the face. The laughter stopped, and Ivan simply looked at Griff as if he were either trying to figure out if he had really been punched, or if he was trying to decide if Griff was sane. He and Griff stared eachother down, Miguel came to stand guard over me, probably at Griff's request, but Antony seemed to have run off...Ivan raised his fist twards Griff, Griff simply let it hit him, trying to be the big, tough guy he likes to think he is, but it hurt him- I could see it in his eyes, even though Miguel was telling me not to watch. Griff raised his fists, Ivan did the same- and they began fighting. Before anyone knew what happened, Antony reappeared behind Griff. Miguel tried to warn him, but it was too late- Antony had a knife, and he used it to cut deep into Griffs back. I can still hear Griffs cry in my mind- Playing over and over, like the time Hanger fell in the pit and kept calling for help until Father arrived. I hadn't ever seen Griff in such pain, I thought he might just die right there, leave Father and I- Like Mother had years ago. I felt so powerless, I had no way to help him. Miguel quickly went and fetched a healer, as I stood, watching, crying as Griff tried desparatly to do something about the deep cut in his back.
It's all my fault. Had I been stronger, had I not given in and cried...Griff wouldn't have been hurt. I hate to see people get hurt like that. I hate to see people fight. I hate violence.
Reshtara 20th, 1300
Dear Diary-
I think I've found my calling in life.
Father says it's nonesense- Girls don't know what they want to do until well into their lives. But I truely think I know what I want to do- I want to study and become a healer.
I spoke to the woman who helped Griff the day Antony cut him. She told me such interesting things! Did you know that the magic we refer to simply as "Healing magic" here is called "White Magic" on the mainland? It's also holy, or so the woman said. Father says it's nonsense- No Barian could ever use 'holy' magic. He says the gods hate us. It's why we're forced to live on our island, in our cities of eternal rain, snow, wind, and icy-rocks. It's why they sent the demons to kill our ancestors. It's why Mother was taken from us, why I stutter, why Griff is so eerily quiet. I don't beleive him, though. I know I should, because he's my father, but....I don't. Anyhow, I spoke with her for awhile, and she said anyone with magical talent can learn the art of Healing Magic. And if I knew Healing Magic, I could help Griff the next time he gets hurt. Just as he tried to help me when I was being made fun of. She even gave me a small book on it- She said that if I read it carefully, I should be able to cast a small healing spell, to heal things like paper-cuts, or scrapes. It's not much, I suppose, but it's a start. Father, however, wants me to continue my studies into Lightning magic. I don't know why he wants his daughter to be able to summon lightning- There's enough in this city as it is. But for right now, I think I'm going to go get started on my studies. Wish me luck, diary!
Edited by: Shinigori V2 at: 10/7/03 12:39 am