Link Vs The Drive threw window
Note: It is one am and I am not tired. So I decided to put Link in a situation that many of us have been in. Of course I am making it a bit stranger (Grins evily.) Enjoy. Oh and I don't own the rights to Zelda it belongs to Nintendo bla bla. If I did I would be rich. (I'm not bashing L.A, I want to go there someday. Hay that rhymed.)
Setting: Link is riding Epona towards Hyrule castle as fast as he can. As he nears the castle a bright flash of light engulfs him and he is instantly transported to a place that is very odd to him and many other people (L.A). As he rides he sees a Burger King in the distance. Since there are so many metal creatures rushing towards it he decides that it must be a place where many questions are answered. . .how wrong he is.
Link: (Rides Epona to the Burger King and waits in the line of cars. Behind him an Elderly woman and her husband stare at him oddly.) Easy Epona . .I'm sure we can get out of this insane place. Lets just try to see what is attracting these metal beasts.
Old Woman: (Leans out of the car and waves her fist in the air.) Hay. . .
Link: (Turns and looks at the woman.) Me?
Old Woman: Yeah you. Are you apart of some kinda movie shoot?
Link: A what?
Old Woman: A movie.
Link: A what?
Old Woman: (Shouts) A MOVIE!
Link: What's a Movie?
Old Woman: Oh I get it your in character right?
Link: What?
Old woman: Never mind Sorry for interrupting.
Link: (Turns back around and sees one of the metal machines are moving. He gently kicks Epona to walk forward. She does and stops,) The metal beasts! (Link shouts) They have devoured men and women. . .Oh no and children too. We must save them!
Mom: (Sits in a car with her husband and her children. She sees Link waving a sword and takes out her camera.) Oh my a real actor. Look kids.
Little Billy: (His eyes grow wide) Moooom. I want a kids meal.
Little Suzy: That man is scaring me.
Link: (Link shouts) I shall save you from that beast that has eaten you.
(The mother claps as the children hide in the back seat. The father is busy shouting at Link to get a hair cut. They drive on and Link rides up to the Drive threw window.)
Window Lady: Ksssshhhhh. Hewooo
Epona: (Tilts her head as if she is confused.)
Link: (Pokes the window with his sword.) Some kind of magic. . .it seems that there are words coming from this. . .large box. . but I do not know what the mean.
Window Lady: Welllllam fo Baaaga King kshhhhh can I takeyourorder.
Link: What? Take. . .something?
Window Lady: Can I takeyourorder kashhhh.
Link: I demand to know where I am?
Window lady: Wadya like a hapel pie with that?
Link: An apple pie?
Window Lady: Two apple pies?
link: I understood you. . .tell me quickly maiden in the box. How do I get to Hyrule castle.
Window Lady: Order of Fries.
Link: Enough of this.
Window Lady: Pull around please.
Link: (Rides Epona to the pick up window where a short pimply faced boy hands him a bag filled with apple pies and a side order of fries. Link Takes them and stares at the boy.) Are you a Kokiri? Are you trapped?
Pimple boy: (Rolls his eyes.) That will be twenty two dollars and one cent sir.
Link: Do not fear I shall free you from this prison and take you back to the forest where you can once again play with the others. Come my brother. (Holds out his hand to Pimple boy.)
Pimple Boy: (Turns and looks over his shoulder) Mr. Simians . .It's happening again. Some actor is trying to pick me up.
Link: Come get on my mount, and we shall ride away.
Pimple Boy: Uh. . .no. Are you going to pay?
Link: Pay? The Monster that keeps you prisoner will pay.
Pimple Boy: Oh, you want to see my manager? Hold on.
(There is angry honking behind Link. Epona gets spooked and kicks the car behind her. the old woman and the old man jump and seem scared. The old man fumbels with some pills as the old woman grabs her chest.)
Mr. Simians: Is there a problem here.
Link: Ah your the one keeping this child a prisoner. Come with my my brother of the forest and we shall ride together. Where is your fairy?
Mr. Simians: Look buddy I know that you actors like to harass my staff so get lost.
Link: Actually I am lost. I'm looking for Hyrule castle.
Mr. Simians: That's it I'm calling the police. (Picks up the phone and starts to dial.)
Link: (Is suddenly transported to the chamber of Sages where Impa is waiting for him. She waves her hand and Epona disappears.) Impa. . .? What did you do with Epona?
Impa: I sent her back to the ranch.
Link: Why?
Impa: Well she is a horse, and I don't feel like cleaning up her droppings.
Link: Oh.. . wait a minuet. . .what the hell just happened.
Impa: Well do you remember when we told you about fanfic writers?
Link: Yes. . .why?
Impa: I am afraid you fell victim to Bunny Girle once again.
Link: Damn it.
Impa: It seems that she wrote you into that situation very late at night. We sages know little about the powers of Fanfic writers. But we do know this. . .some of them turn evil. They take their favorite characters and put them in humiliating situations.
Link: And this Bunny Girle.
Impa: Is the most twisted of them all.
Link: Is there no escape from this horrible fate.
Impa: Stop being so dramatic. Take it as a complement. She likes you.
Link: If she does this to people she likes what does she do to those she hates/
Gannnon: ( Appears suddenly. Impa and link jump. He is wearing a pink leotard and holding a large brown teddy bear.) You don't want to know. (Disappears as mysteriously as he arrived.)
link: Maybe this fanfic creature isn't so bad after all. <p>"Seek out a Kingdom worthy of your soul."
Reign the conquer.</p>Edited by: [url=http://pub30.ezboard.com/brpgww60462.showUserPublicProfile?gid=bunnygirle78>bunnygirle78</A]
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