"But it's all right because"

Mmm, spam. Light discussion and silliness!

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Jak Snide
 
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Unread postby Jak Snide » Tue Mar 18, 2008 5:59 pm

But it's alright, because now I'm the goddamn Batman.

There's a snake in my boot.

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Justice Augustus
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Unread postby Justice Augustus » Tue Mar 18, 2008 8:30 pm

But that's all right because it's your trouser snake, and that means you're sure to be a hit with the ladies. Either that or you're a pervert.

I found myself in a single small fracas and it led to my female parent becoming frightened...

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PriamNevhausten
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Unread postby PriamNevhausten » Wed Mar 19, 2008 8:28 am

But it's okay, because thanks to my quick reflexes and fast-on-my-feet thinking, I skillfully hit her with a brick and threw her out the window with great success and alacrity.

I just read every single Oprah-recommended book back to back to back...
"You haven't told me what I'm looking for."
"Anything that might be of interest to Slitscan. Which is to say, anything that might be of interest to Slitscan's audience. Which is best visualized as a vicious, lazy, profoundly ignorant, perpetually hungry organism craving the warm god-flesh of the anointed. Personally I like to imagine something the size of a baby hippo, the color of a week-old boiled potato, that lives by itself, in the dark, in a double-wide on the outskirts of Topeka. It's covered with eyes and it sweats constantly. The sweat runs into those eyes and makes them sting. It has no mouth, Laney, no genitals, and can only express its mute extremes of murderous rage and infantile desire by changing the channels on a universal remote. Or by voting in presidential elections."
--Colin Laney and Kathy Torrance, William Gibson's Idoru

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Jak Snide
 
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Unread postby Jak Snide » Wed Mar 19, 2008 8:42 am

But it's alright because Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.

The rats took my eyes!

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Capntastic
Aa, cracked glass!
 
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Unread postby Capntastic » Wed Mar 19, 2008 3:29 pm

But that's all right because we don't need them where we're going.

An electric hippie bus just crashed outside my house and now they're asking to use my phone.

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Spleen
I put a BOMB inside EVERY BAD GUY!
 
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Unread postby Spleen » Sun Mar 23, 2008 1:48 pm

But it's all right because the phone's on the other side of the deathtrap and the zombies are hungry.

My long-dead business partner's ghost is here, telling me I'm going to be visited by three spirits who will teach me the true meaning of Christmas!
"Tell you what, Leto, I won't fight with you. Zeus' wives are pretty tough customers. You have my permission to boast openly that you have beaten the daylights out of me."
-Hermes, the Iliad (Stanley Lombardo, translator) Book 21

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Christian
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Unread postby Christian » Sun Mar 23, 2008 2:03 pm

But it's alright, because you already fired the guy with the crippled kid.

I just spent all my money buying stocks in shady businesses in China...

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glu-glu
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Unread postby glu-glu » Sun Mar 23, 2008 2:59 pm

But it's all right, because you will have sold them for twice the cost by the time the U.N. shuts down the sweatshop.

I am the last man on earth, and my glasses just fell down and shattered D:
sig pending...

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Justice Augustus
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Unread postby Justice Augustus » Sun Mar 23, 2008 5:45 pm

But that's alright because you have perfect eyesight and the internet is still working.

The sleeper has awoken!

Geesi
I fix problems.
 
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Unread postby Geesi » Sun Mar 23, 2008 9:53 pm

But that's all right, because his porridge is just hot enough for his liking.

I would've gotten away with it if it weren't for those meddling kids...

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Spleen
I put a BOMB inside EVERY BAD GUY!
 
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Unread postby Spleen » Sun Mar 23, 2008 10:59 pm

But it's all right because it's one of the few episodes where they decide you had a perfectly legitimate reason for being so pissed at everybody and have decided to help you in some way.

I can't think of a question.
"Tell you what, Leto, I won't fight with you. Zeus' wives are pretty tough customers. You have my permission to boast openly that you have beaten the daylights out of me."
-Hermes, the Iliad (Stanley Lombardo, translator) Book 21

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Besyanteo
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Unread postby Besyanteo » Sun Mar 23, 2008 11:13 pm

But it's alright, because Bes was going to answer it and that just wouldn't be funny at all.

I am a slave to my comics and the F5 key.

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Spleen
I put a BOMB inside EVERY BAD GUY!
 
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Unread postby Spleen » Mon Mar 24, 2008 10:07 am

But that's all right, because the finger stamina I'm building is phenomenal!

I got my head bashed in with a brick...
"Tell you what, Leto, I won't fight with you. Zeus' wives are pretty tough customers. You have my permission to boast openly that you have beaten the daylights out of me."
-Hermes, the Iliad (Stanley Lombardo, translator) Book 21

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Ark
Cho wants to kill with cute
 
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Unread postby Ark » Mon Mar 24, 2008 10:15 am

But its alright as you've forgotten those horrible years trapped in that man's basement.

My long missing girlfriend has just re-appeared with a two year old kid... and its mine!
[img]http://www.fantasydragon.net/choark/Signature.jpg[/img]
Some detectives just have The Touch

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BrainWalker
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Unread postby BrainWalker » Mon Mar 24, 2008 2:11 pm

But it's okay, because no one will ever find their bodies.

I'm late coming into this thread, and I want to give props to Jak and Molo even thought it would break the format of the thread...

Geesi
I fix problems.
 
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Unread postby Geesi » Mon Mar 24, 2008 3:44 pm

But you don't need to worry about that if you can help make this thing long enough that page 2 is 'early' while still keeping it interesting. Get cracking!

Ninjas killed my famiy...

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Justice Augustus
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Unread postby Justice Augustus » Mon Mar 24, 2008 4:23 pm

But that's ok cause famiy is an alien word meaning "person who will eventually kill me". Your family is perfectly ok.

I'm not only a man...

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Jak Snide
 
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Unread postby Jak Snide » Mon Mar 24, 2008 5:55 pm

But it's alright because you're a man and a half! A berserker packing man and a half! Here comes the night train! Chugga chugga choo choo!

I posted a terrible thing

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Spleen
I put a BOMB inside EVERY BAD GUY!
 
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Unread postby Spleen » Mon Mar 24, 2008 6:00 pm

But it's all right, because how many people are gonna read that post? Like, fifteen, tops? And we all like you anyway.

I went back in time and killed my grandfather...
"Tell you what, Leto, I won't fight with you. Zeus' wives are pretty tough customers. You have my permission to boast openly that you have beaten the daylights out of me."
-Hermes, the Iliad (Stanley Lombardo, translator) Book 21

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Ark
Cho wants to kill with cute
 
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Unread postby Ark » Mon Mar 24, 2008 7:43 pm

But its fine cause ya totally got laid by some hot chick with the same first name as ya Grandma.

I managed to put myself in over £50,000 through Chinese take away bills...
[img]http://www.fantasydragon.net/choark/Signature.jpg[/img]
Some detectives just have The Touch

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Jak Snide
 
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Unread postby Jak Snide » Mon Mar 24, 2008 7:53 pm

But it's all right because you're suing China itself for damages to your circulatory system.

This happened to me earlier today

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Christian
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Unread postby Christian » Mon Mar 24, 2008 8:12 pm

But it's alright because... because...

no, it's not alright. And it never will be. You murdered him Jak, and no matter how much you want to, you can never make it undone. I'm sorry.

I just lost my wife and child in a terrible accident...

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Besyanteo
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Unread postby Besyanteo » Mon Mar 24, 2008 9:15 pm

But it's alright, because the resulting sausages were DELICIOUS.

This bird I bought in London is dead, it has ceased to be...

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Justice Augustus
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Unread postby Justice Augustus » Mon Mar 24, 2008 10:35 pm

But that's alright because if you head to Notlob you'll get a complete refund.

A nasty man forbade me from having any soup!

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Christian
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Unread postby Christian » Tue Mar 25, 2008 3:59 am

But it's alright, because you hate soup and you have no idea what this mad man was rambling on about.

I'm standing before a eight feet tall T-Virus mutant with a blonde mad man in sunglasses heckling me from the sidelines...

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Ark
Cho wants to kill with cute
 
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Unread postby Ark » Tue Mar 25, 2008 9:13 am

But its alright because there brains look tasty.

I'm on the run, no money, food, or friends, and this gun wound on my sholder won't stop bleeding...
[img]http://www.fantasydragon.net/choark/Signature.jpg[/img]
Some detectives just have The Touch

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Spleen
I put a BOMB inside EVERY BAD GUY!
 
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Unread postby Spleen » Tue Mar 25, 2008 9:23 am

But it's all right because chicks dig scars.

I've accidentally let loose a self-replicating nanomechanical plague that will over the course of the next few years convert the entire mass of the planet.
"Tell you what, Leto, I won't fight with you. Zeus' wives are pretty tough customers. You have my permission to boast openly that you have beaten the daylights out of me."
-Hermes, the Iliad (Stanley Lombardo, translator) Book 21

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pd Rydia
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Unread postby pd Rydia » Tue Mar 25, 2008 10:43 am

But it's okay, because it will convert the mass of the planet into mojo.

I see pink hippos

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PriamNevhausten
Holy Order of the Crimson Ballpoint
 
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Unread postby PriamNevhausten » Tue Mar 25, 2008 12:12 pm

But that's all right, because they will take care of your small-white-marble infestation in a jiffy!

I think your face is ugly...
"You haven't told me what I'm looking for."
"Anything that might be of interest to Slitscan. Which is to say, anything that might be of interest to Slitscan's audience. Which is best visualized as a vicious, lazy, profoundly ignorant, perpetually hungry organism craving the warm god-flesh of the anointed. Personally I like to imagine something the size of a baby hippo, the color of a week-old boiled potato, that lives by itself, in the dark, in a double-wide on the outskirts of Topeka. It's covered with eyes and it sweats constantly. The sweat runs into those eyes and makes them sting. It has no mouth, Laney, no genitals, and can only express its mute extremes of murderous rage and infantile desire by changing the channels on a universal remote. Or by voting in presidential elections."
--Colin Laney and Kathy Torrance, William Gibson's Idoru

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Spleen
I put a BOMB inside EVERY BAD GUY!
 
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Unread postby Spleen » Tue Mar 25, 2008 1:03 pm

But it's all right because you'll be seeing it from the inside soon! Meaning I'm going to swallow you whole.

I can't stop being on fire.
"Tell you what, Leto, I won't fight with you. Zeus' wives are pretty tough customers. You have my permission to boast openly that you have beaten the daylights out of me."
-Hermes, the Iliad (Stanley Lombardo, translator) Book 21

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Besyanteo
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Unread postby Besyanteo » Tue Mar 25, 2008 4:30 pm

But it's ok, because the whole flaming deal is considered socially acceptable these days.

Red Mage has come up with another incomprehensible plan that's probably going to get us all killed...

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Capntastic
Aa, cracked glass!
 
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Unread postby Capntastic » Tue Mar 25, 2008 4:43 pm

But that's okay because his plan involves becoming liches!

My mailman just dropped all the letters in a puddle and then crammed them into the mailbox in a big soggy mess.

Nekogami
 
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Unread postby Nekogami » Tue Mar 25, 2008 5:07 pm

But that's all right, the wet pulp keeps the anthrax down.


Someone at my job has a Captain Kirk poster and it keeps smiling at me....

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Christian
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Unread postby Christian » Wed Mar 26, 2008 4:22 am

But it's alright, because your Picard poster can take him on any day.

I just found myself in the middle of the road, naked except for a bright orange tattoo on my chest...

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Besyanteo
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Unread postby Besyanteo » Wed Mar 26, 2008 7:50 pm

But it's alright, because you can just hitch a ride and convince whoever picks you up that you're a rock star.

Yo, the name is Batty / The logic is erratic, / Potato in a jacket, / Toys in the attic, / I rock and I ramble, / My brain is scrambled, / Rap like an animal but I'm a mammal...

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Spleen
I put a BOMB inside EVERY BAD GUY!
 
Posts: 2625
Joined: Tue Apr 23, 2002 5:07 pm
Location: Demon Realms of Niu-Jiurzi

Unread postby Spleen » Fri Mar 28, 2008 9:17 am

But it's okay, because you're white and people expect this sort of thing.

My TA for this 100-level history class is rambling on about the philosophy we should have used in writing this paper long after it's due.
"Tell you what, Leto, I won't fight with you. Zeus' wives are pretty tough customers. You have my permission to boast openly that you have beaten the daylights out of me."
-Hermes, the Iliad (Stanley Lombardo, translator) Book 21

Nekogami
 
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Unread postby Nekogami » Mon Mar 31, 2008 10:33 pm

But it's all right, because Asshat an acceptable major in college. Just be sure to get your BS in it.

My apartment looks like I've been harboring hobos.

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Justice Augustus
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Unread postby Justice Augustus » Sun Apr 06, 2008 9:39 am

But that's alright because charity begins at home!

Someone stole all the sheets from my bed, and in the morning they kicked me in the head!

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PriamNevhausten
Holy Order of the Crimson Ballpoint
 
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Unread postby PriamNevhausten » Sun Apr 06, 2008 11:38 am

But that's all right, because at least they had the courtesy to let you sleep through the night.

I am eating Taco Bell food and having an energy drink and I'm worried they might cause some sort of super-fission reaction in my gastrointestines!
"You haven't told me what I'm looking for."
"Anything that might be of interest to Slitscan. Which is to say, anything that might be of interest to Slitscan's audience. Which is best visualized as a vicious, lazy, profoundly ignorant, perpetually hungry organism craving the warm god-flesh of the anointed. Personally I like to imagine something the size of a baby hippo, the color of a week-old boiled potato, that lives by itself, in the dark, in a double-wide on the outskirts of Topeka. It's covered with eyes and it sweats constantly. The sweat runs into those eyes and makes them sting. It has no mouth, Laney, no genitals, and can only express its mute extremes of murderous rage and infantile desire by changing the channels on a universal remote. Or by voting in presidential elections."
--Colin Laney and Kathy Torrance, William Gibson's Idoru

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Christian
Dead Stompy
 
Posts: 848
Joined: Wed Feb 13, 2008 7:05 pm
Location: Sweden

Unread postby Christian » Sun Apr 06, 2008 2:15 pm

But that's alright because, frankly, that's about as exciting as this weekend will get anyway. :(

I have a festering thirst for espresso, yet my machine only brews regular joe.

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