The Adventurous kraz, Höek!

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Nakibe
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The Adventurous kraz, Höek!

Unread postby Nakibe » Mon Feb 18, 2008 11:56 pm

Okay, first, I will admit to a little bit of jealousy here. I found a thread about a certain cool character named Microbe over on the Something Awful forums a few days ago. Its a... pretty hot topic, especially considering that the first post was made only a mere 5 days ago. I like it, and am currently still following it. But being the lazy trendwhore I am, I decided to steal the idea for my own nefarious purposes! MWAHAHAHA!

Actually I'm doing this in hopes of livening up the boards a teeny bit. Anyway, I would like to present to you folks that care an unusual creature, found in the woods and full of curiosity about the world. And, of course, HUNGRY.

Image

Aww, isn't he cute? Well, I hope that's a he. Please thank Amanda for taking the time for creating delicious images for your perusal and entertainment. But, *ahem* anyway...

This unusual creature has a future ahead of him, one that you all can decide. One that you all SHOULD decide, because as with all newborns, he just needs a little help.

Right now, though, you can help him by choosing among some artifacts:

Image

No no, not Seeds, silly. I'm not going to rip EVERYTHING off, you know. Well, maybe. Or not.

Anyway, choose three seeds of these that would best help our young friend on his journey through life... and perhaps more than just that....

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Unread postby Capntastic » Tue Feb 19, 2008 12:04 am

The pink one is cool, the blue one is sonic, and the yellow one is a marshmallow peep. Do those!

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Unread postby Nekogami » Tue Feb 19, 2008 12:10 am

I'm usually not a pink person, but I like the pink one.
They blue one is swag and the green one looks like that one dude from the Gang Green Gang. You know the snake-y one.

And in keeping with the SA tradition...

Gently Caress: Yellow. It's clearly Mr. Peanut and therefore smarmy...

Smarmy bastard.

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Unread postby Taiar » Tue Feb 19, 2008 12:46 am

Pink one reminds me of Kirby so he's in.

I can't ignore Capntastic's comment about Sonic and now it's on my mind...Blue guy is in too.

And I like the sharp curves of the green guy more than the yellow guy...so he's on the boat too.

Pink, Blue, Green. Don't feel bad yellow guy...I have nothing against you.

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Christian
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Unread postby Christian » Tue Feb 19, 2008 2:04 am

Pink, green and yellow

:3

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Unread postby Endesu » Tue Feb 19, 2008 2:06 am

Christian wrote:Pink, green and yellow

:3


Pink, green, and blue just to offset that. HA

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Unread postby Capntastic » Tue Feb 19, 2008 2:12 am

Adventurous thing is not the best :(

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Nakibe
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Unread postby Nakibe » Tue Feb 19, 2008 2:52 am

Clearly he is not The Best, and I will not deny this.

.... but he can't even be Adventurous with THAT attitude, mister. >:{{{

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Unread postby Capntastic » Tue Feb 19, 2008 3:06 am

He'll have to settle for something else, like feistiest.

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Unread postby NamagomiMk0 » Tue Feb 19, 2008 4:59 am

Blue, yellow, and green. Pink randomly reminds me of sperm for some disturbing reason.

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Unread postby PriamNevhausten » Tue Feb 19, 2008 9:39 am

Blue, blue.
"You haven't told me what I'm looking for."
"Anything that might be of interest to Slitscan. Which is to say, anything that might be of interest to Slitscan's audience. Which is best visualized as a vicious, lazy, profoundly ignorant, perpetually hungry organism craving the warm god-flesh of the anointed. Personally I like to imagine something the size of a baby hippo, the color of a week-old boiled potato, that lives by itself, in the dark, in a double-wide on the outskirts of Topeka. It's covered with eyes and it sweats constantly. The sweat runs into those eyes and makes them sting. It has no mouth, Laney, no genitals, and can only express its mute extremes of murderous rage and infantile desire by changing the channels on a universal remote. Or by voting in presidential elections."
--Colin Laney and Kathy Torrance, William Gibson's Idoru

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Unread postby Archmage » Tue Feb 19, 2008 11:53 am

Green, green...

...wait.
Image

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pd Rydia
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Re: The Adventurous... err, something-or-other.

Unread postby pd Rydia » Tue Feb 19, 2008 1:35 pm

Nakibe wrote:Image
Anyway, choose three seeds of these that would best help our young friend on his journey through life... and perhaps more than just that....


Green looks like cash, or maybe the Capitol Hill Bill. Our little friend could benefit well from financial security OR political savvy. It also might be cool if he turned into a singing legal document. Green is so in.

Blue looks like a Sonic balloon with the tie at his mouth. Sonic is fast and the danger, two useful abilities, but I fear him VA'd were he filled with helium, thus it's not bad that he's tied off at the mouth. Additionally, this works awesome with Green since our little buddy could just hit himself anytime he needs some cash. Blue is in!

Pink looks like Kirby. The tail actually reminds me a bit of his predecessors, Lolo/Lala (and sperm). At any rate, we all know Kirby's awesome. Being able to fill himself full of air--hot, cold, or otherwise--would go well with the political-mindedness of green, and also with Blue should it have a hidden balloon element. Also, being able to suck stuff up would be useful for when OurCrobe hits himself for cash and scatters his earnings around. Pink is IN.

Yellow does indeed look like a peep and that would just get him eaten. Also, it's yellow. NOT IN.

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Unread postby Christian » Tue Feb 19, 2008 1:53 pm

But if he sucks the money back in, wouldn't that be kinda contraproductive?

Look closely at the yellow little thing. He looks like a bald, fat man with pouty lips. Obviously he is living the good life, exploding with testosterone and delicious veal; Thus absorbation of his bio-mass would serve our friend well.



EDIT: Because I dont' can't spell or grammar be using!

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Unread postby pd Rydia » Tue Feb 19, 2008 2:34 pm

Only if he eats it. I mean, you can spit money out, right?

And hey, the little pink guy has got a sperm-like appendage. How much more virile do you get than that? The trick is to be well and wealthy without being excessive--after all, how's he going to get it on with the lovelies if he grows obese from the sugary sweet poison that is, uh, excess?

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Unread postby glu-glu » Tue Feb 19, 2008 3:41 pm

Pink, green and blue!

My fave colors (but mainly pink).
sig pending...

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Nakibe
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Unread postby Nakibe » Tue Feb 19, 2008 5:04 pm

Would be counting votes, but Zero's harsh words have cut me to the quick! ;_;

That and I'm feeling sick. I'll try to get on this around the time the room stops trying to spin.

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Unread postby Christian » Tue Feb 19, 2008 5:08 pm

Nakibe wrote:Would be counting votes, but Zero's harsh words have cut me to the quick! ;_;

That and I'm feeling sick. I'll try to get on this around the time the room stops trying to spin.


How about instead of being The Best, what about "The Runner-Up?"

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Unread postby Capntastic » Tue Feb 19, 2008 6:11 pm

Christian wrote:
Nakibe wrote:Would be counting votes, but Zero's harsh words have cut me to the quick! ;_;

That and I'm feeling sick. I'll try to get on this around the time the room stops trying to spin.


How about instead of being The Best, what about "The Runner-Up?"


He ain't Foxcrobe either! >:

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Unread postby Clark » Tue Feb 19, 2008 6:42 pm

The way he's getting so touchy, you'd think Zero made the original Microbe. I mean, that's the only reason to be like that, right?

I think there is room in the world for both, they are microscopic after all.

I like its(?) fluffiness.

It(?) does need a name though.

Edit: I forgot to vote. Pink, Blue and Green seem to be cool.

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Unread postby Capntastic » Tue Feb 19, 2008 6:55 pm

Image

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Unread postby Christian » Tue Feb 19, 2008 7:01 pm

I know I should really be sleeping right now, but this travesty cannot stand!

Image

Up until the recent one hundred years or so, being obese has always been a sign of success and wealth, slim people were poor and starving.

Recently, however, due to marketing campaigns strangely similar to those used by the Campaign Administrators of Green, Slimness has been promoted as the new Fat. That's right people, the people responsible for Slim has basically spat in the eye of thousands of years of idolization and fertility symbolism, setting in essence the balance of this world on a train without brakes. There's no getting off this train we're on, they say, but I say:

Vote Right, Vote Sensibly, Vote Yellow.

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Unread postby Nekogami » Tue Feb 19, 2008 7:26 pm

YELLOW IS SMARMY!!!

CAN NO ONE HERE SEE THE SMARM???


Look at it's left eye...LOOK! I bet it drinks earl grey tea and reads the New Yorker while listening to Bach but it only pretends to enjoy the classics and refined life so the Countryclubcrobes will invite it to tennis...

SMARMY!!!

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Unread postby PriamNevhausten » Tue Feb 19, 2008 10:07 pm

Chemists might note that the pink one, tail notwithstanding, has a benzene shape. I think we all know what that means.

Addendum: I would like to nominate the name of this thing as a "kraz." What its name is as an individual is not something I feel comfortable postulating.
"You haven't told me what I'm looking for."
"Anything that might be of interest to Slitscan. Which is to say, anything that might be of interest to Slitscan's audience. Which is best visualized as a vicious, lazy, profoundly ignorant, perpetually hungry organism craving the warm god-flesh of the anointed. Personally I like to imagine something the size of a baby hippo, the color of a week-old boiled potato, that lives by itself, in the dark, in a double-wide on the outskirts of Topeka. It's covered with eyes and it sweats constantly. The sweat runs into those eyes and makes them sting. It has no mouth, Laney, no genitals, and can only express its mute extremes of murderous rage and infantile desire by changing the channels on a universal remote. Or by voting in presidential elections."
--Colin Laney and Kathy Torrance, William Gibson's Idoru

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Current Tally

Unread postby Nekogami » Wed Feb 20, 2008 12:00 am

For Shaun's sake:

Pink: 7
Blue: 7
Yellow: 3
Green: 8


Edit: I think the beasty's personal name should be Hoek, after the scientist.

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Unread postby BrainWalker » Thu Feb 21, 2008 7:52 pm

Höek the kraz? I can support this.

Pink looks like kirby, a sperm, an umbrella, a padlock, and apparently benzene, all at the same time. As a man who can barely do two things at once, I have to respect such an impressive multitasker.

I was totally stoked when I heard Sonic was gonna be in Smash Brothers Brawl, so Blue also makes the cut.

Yellow reminds me of both tits and ass, two causes that I support with enthusiasm. However, Green reminds me of something that is perhaps more appropriate for our little Höek. Decisions, decisions...

I think I'll go with Yellow, since it also reminds me of Mr.Peanut, who is classy.
Anime is kind of like fish in that it is better the less "fishy" it is.

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Unread postby Capntastic » Thu Feb 21, 2008 8:21 pm

I vote for an update >:!

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Nakibe
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Unread postby Nakibe » Thu Feb 21, 2008 9:25 pm

Your vote has been heard~! And possibly counted! Please hold while our Super Advanced Addumacating machines get done tallying the votes.

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Unread postby PriamNevhausten » Fri Feb 22, 2008 11:43 am

In the interim, I provide Zero with a topic update to chew on to tide him over.
"You haven't told me what I'm looking for."
"Anything that might be of interest to Slitscan. Which is to say, anything that might be of interest to Slitscan's audience. Which is best visualized as a vicious, lazy, profoundly ignorant, perpetually hungry organism craving the warm god-flesh of the anointed. Personally I like to imagine something the size of a baby hippo, the color of a week-old boiled potato, that lives by itself, in the dark, in a double-wide on the outskirts of Topeka. It's covered with eyes and it sweats constantly. The sweat runs into those eyes and makes them sting. It has no mouth, Laney, no genitals, and can only express its mute extremes of murderous rage and infantile desire by changing the channels on a universal remote. Or by voting in presidential elections."
--Colin Laney and Kathy Torrance, William Gibson's Idoru

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pd Rydia
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Unread postby pd Rydia » Fri Feb 22, 2008 4:36 pm

Oh boy I'm so excited! I can hardly wait!

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Christian
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Unread postby Christian » Fri Feb 22, 2008 4:41 pm

Come on people, it's still not too late, Yellow can... I can promise that...

Yellow's not gonna...


He's not smarmy, ok? He's got an eye-condition, he was born that way. Don't judge him like that! Please... pleaaaaheheheheeeese...


...

Right, so, I wonder what happens when he eats those seeds, I've kept from checking out the Original thing just so I wouldn't spoil the surprise! :)

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Capntastic
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Unread postby Capntastic » Mon Feb 25, 2008 3:53 am

Seeds ain' for eatin'! They's for growin'!

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pd Rydia
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Unread postby pd Rydia » Mon Feb 25, 2008 2:44 pm

Growin' inside the belleh!

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Unread postby Nekogami » Mon Feb 25, 2008 8:36 pm

Someone needs to harrass Shaun. >:

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Capntastic
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Unread postby Capntastic » Mon Feb 25, 2008 8:41 pm

And make him update, too.

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Nakibe
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Unread postby Nakibe » Mon Feb 25, 2008 10:36 pm

The winning votes have been Pink, Blue, and Green, by the way. Pictures are incoming shortly, but you may be surprised by what you all have chosen!

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Unread postby Nekogami » Tue Feb 26, 2008 6:43 am

Hey, he posted and we just threatened to harass him (oh and make him post). I suggest we research the threat of lynching him...(oh...and making him post.).

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Nakibe
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Unread postby Nakibe » Wed Feb 27, 2008 10:35 pm

Fear me, for I POST~!

Image

Sadly, the yellow thing you folks gave up on turned out to be delicious mushrooms. In the meantime, our adventurous Hoek thinks that there's something interesting deeper in the forest....

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Unread postby Nekogami » Thu Feb 28, 2008 5:52 am

Our Hoek needs to assimilate the DNA of the flying stinging dragonfly.

SPEED, MANEUVERABILITY, AND OFFENSE! Clearly it is the F-22 of the kraz world. (Starscream anyone?)

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Unread postby Christian » Thu Feb 28, 2008 8:14 am

Höek! Go for the pink thing. There's only one, and as a sentient being it is your duty to ensure the extinction of lesser species. Go Höek, for the glory of Höekia!

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