Stunning quotes

[Ganonfro]

Sometimes you run into things that someone said and think "...He can't really be saying that"

...This thread is for it! I don't want crappy meme's in here. I don't want people claiming they "won" this thread. That crap has got to stop. It's annoying.


MY CONTRIBUTION: From the GameFAQs message board on Pokemon Diamond, on a topic of "Would you rather get the girl of your dreams..." -Or Pearl and Diamond tomorrow.

"P&D, plz. Who needs female companionship, when you can pwn 10-year-olds. With pride :D"
- fruitsalads

...Seriously. That's funny on so many levels, its mind boggling.

[ikozaedro]

dear god, please tell no people chose "Pokemon diamond/pearl".

anyway, as for me...meh, funny quotes will be posted as i remember them. <p><div style="text-align:center">
my deviant art thingy!
quote:
"-Lili! a deranged man is building an army of psychic death tanks to take over the world and there is nobody who can stop him except for you and me!
-Oh my god! LET'S MAKE OUT!"-Raz and Lili, Psychonauts</div>
</p>

[PriamNevhausten]

What about women, and gay guys? Do they still get a dream 'girl?' <p><span style="font-size:xx-small;">"It's in the air, in the headlines in the newspapers, in the blurry images on television. It is a secret you have yet to grasp, although the first syllable has been spoken in a dream you cannot quite recall." --Unknown Armies</span></p>

[Justice Augustus]

Yes they do, and they'll like it godamnit! <p>

---

"Moreover, when on the following night, much to his dismay, [Caesar] had a dream of raping his own mother, the soothsayers greatly encouraged him by their interpretations of it: namely, that he was destined to conquer the earth" - Suetonius, The Twelve Caesars - Julius Caesar, chapter 7</p>

[Ganonfro]

Well, I guess they assume gay guys don't play pokemon, since most are kids in middle school posting there.

...And there were one or two, GluGlu. Some said their dream girl HAD the games too.

[ikozaedro]

<blockquote>Quote:

---

Some said their dream girl HAD the games too.

---

</blockquote>

thats more clever than what i expected from Gamefaqs forum goers. <p><div style="text-align:center">
my deviant art thingy!
quote:
"-Lili! a deranged man is building an army of psychic death tanks to take over the world and there is nobody who can stop him except for you and me!
-Oh my god! LET'S MAKE OUT!"-Raz and Lili, Psychonauts</div>
</p>

[Dragon Sage007]

From two girls, just as I turn the corner...

"I would be the worst husband beater ever."

DISCUSS.

Also, that's pretty damn clever, but it misses a key component. What if their dream girl doesn't want to share? :{

[Zemyla]

From an unknown source (probably a newspaper):

"In capitalism, man exploits man. In communism, it's the other way around." <p>-----
Do not taunt Happy Fun Zemyla.

<span style="font-size:xx-small;">I think boobs are the lesser of two evils. - Inverse (Pervy)
Dammit, Dan, I'm not dating a damn NPC! - OOC Will (Will Baseton)
Of course! Anything worth doing is worth doing completely wrong! - Travis English
Ultimately, wizards and clerics don't say, "Gee, I want to become a lich because weapons hurt less and I don't have to worry about being backstabbed; that whole 'eternal life' thing is just a fringe benefit."-Darklion
But this one time I killed a walrus with my bare hands, and I suddenly understood spherical coordinates. - KnightsofSquare
Also, when you've worked a 36-hour shift as an intern you too just might pour yourself a catful of coffee and sit down to cuddle with your travel mug. -eirehound
</span>

Adventurers! | RPG World World | d20 Optimization Boards</p>

[Justice Augustus]

Talking to an American in an airport:

American: "You're British? How come you don't have bad teeth?"
Me: "How come you're not morbidly obese?" <p>

---

"Moreover, when on the following night, much to his dismay, [Caesar] had a dream of raping his own mother, the soothsayers greatly encouraged him by their interpretations of it: namely, that he was destined to conquer the earth" - Suetonius, The Twelve Caesars - Julius Caesar, chapter 7</p>

[E Mouse]

Dental health is overrated. <p><hr />

<span style="font-size:xx-small;">"Their rhetoric... You didn't put communists in his bed did you!" came Amber's indignant reply.

"Why not? All I had to do was open a gate to his bed and stick up a sign saying 'Hot virgin willing to make the ultimate sacrifice in the name of international socialist fraternity.'"</span>

<span style="color:blue;font-size:xx-small;">Excaliburned:</span> <span style="font-size:xx-small;">Ah yes, I'm thinking of having the USS Bob be preserved outside the Arena as a monument of sorts</span></p>

[Ganonfro]

Well done Gus. You show us bloody yanks what for! :D

[NamagomiMk0]

Obviously, the older people here (should) remember it. For those who don't, here's a rather infamous quote from Gamecombos lameass kyROCKxx (Note: if this one is inappropriate for the thread, I'll delete it myself.):

"dizzy tell me sol have penis of lava"

I couldn't make that kind of shit up if I tried. Sad thing is, the conversation then devolved into something about some H-doujin. <p>"DO YOU THINK YOU CAN DEFEAT US? OUR TREASURE MAY BE HEAVY, BUT WE ARE LIGHT AS WIND. ONLY MAGICS MAY HURT US, BUT ONLY WE KNOW WHICH ONES." --Omoikane, Digital Devil Saga 2</p>

[E Mouse]

"I don't see the point of non-erotic art..." <p><hr />

<span style="font-size:xx-small;">"Their rhetoric... You didn't put communists in his bed did you!" came Amber's indignant reply.

"Why not? All I had to do was open a gate to his bed and stick up a sign saying 'Hot virgin willing to make the ultimate sacrifice in the name of international socialist fraternity.'"</span>

<span style="color:blue;font-size:xx-small;">Excaliburned:</span> <span style="font-size:xx-small;">Ah yes, I'm thinking of having the USS Bob be preserved outside the Arena as a monument of sorts</span></p>

[Zemyla]

From a bathroom stall:

"You can't shit here, your asshole is in Washington." <p>-----
Do not taunt Happy Fun Zemyla.

<span style="font-size:xx-small;">I think boobs are the lesser of two evils. - Inverse (Pervy)
Dammit, Dan, I'm not dating a damn NPC! - OOC Will (Will Baseton)
Of course! Anything worth doing is worth doing completely wrong! - Travis English
Ultimately, wizards and clerics don't say, "Gee, I want to become a lich because weapons hurt less and I don't have to worry about being backstabbed; that whole 'eternal life' thing is just a fringe benefit."-Darklion
But this one time I killed a walrus with my bare hands, and I suddenly understood spherical coordinates. - KnightsofSquare
Also, when you've worked a 36-hour shift as an intern you too just might pour yourself a catful of coffee and sit down to cuddle with your travel mug. -eirehound
</span>

Adventurers! | RPG World World | d20 Optimization Boards</p>

[Spleen]

Your asshole is in another castle? <p>-_-___-___-___-_-

"The universe is all in the mind that perceives it, and sensation is the first and only reality. If a tree falls in the forest with no creature to hear it, then there is no tree."
-Dungeons and Dragons: Complete Arcane, page 167

Arch mage144: Spleen doesn't bother with penis size contests; instead, he goes straight to penis number.</p>

[Ganonfro]

...E, that quote brings back many bad memories... I must now hunt you down MOST DANGEROUS GAME style after I strand you on a tropical island.

[ikozaedro]

question: is there any kind of "the most dangerous game" game? because, no matter what kind of game it could be, something is for sure, awesomeness is granted. <p><div style="text-align:center">
my deviant art thingy!
quote:
"-Lili! a deranged man is building an army of psychic death tanks to take over the world and there is nobody who can stop him except for you and me!
-Oh my god! LET'S MAKE OUT!"-Raz and Lili, Psychonauts</div>
</p>

[E Mouse]

The Most Dangerous Game: The Eyedrop Simulator <p><hr />

<span style="font-size:xx-small;">"Their rhetoric... You didn't put communists in his bed did you!" came Amber's indignant reply.

"Why not? All I had to do was open a gate to his bed and stick up a sign saying 'Hot virgin willing to make the ultimate sacrifice in the name of international socialist fraternity.'"</span>

<span style="color:blue;font-size:xx-small;">Excaliburned:</span> <span style="font-size:xx-small;">Ah yes, I'm thinking of having the USS Bob be preserved outside the Arena as a monument of sorts</span></p>

[Zemyla]

I'm holding out for the "'most dangerous game' game" game. <p>-----
Do not taunt Happy Fun Zemyla.

<span style="font-size:xx-small;">I think boobs are the lesser of two evils. - Inverse (Pervy)
Dammit, Dan, I'm not dating a damn NPC! - OOC Will (Will Baseton)
Of course! Anything worth doing is worth doing completely wrong! - Travis English
Ultimately, wizards and clerics don't say, "Gee, I want to become a lich because weapons hurt less and I don't have to worry about being backstabbed; that whole 'eternal life' thing is just a fringe benefit."-Darklion
But this one time I killed a walrus with my bare hands, and I suddenly understood spherical coordinates. - KnightsofSquare
Also, when you've worked a 36-hour shift as an intern you too just might pour yourself a catful of coffee and sit down to cuddle with your travel mug. -eirehound
</span>

Adventurers! | RPG World World | d20 Optimization Boards</p>